


3.6.5

by kenzierinne



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Character Death, M/M, One Shot, Self-Harm, Slice of Life, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2016-10-16
Packaged: 2018-08-19 06:53:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 22,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8194586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kenzierinne/pseuds/kenzierinne
Summary: Park Chanyeol was told he only had 365 days to live. From the day of his diagnosis on, he vowed to live his life to the fullest and live every day like it was his last. Byun Baekhyun was just an average person who was a victim of abuse and suffered from depression. With a bucket list, a puffer and each other, the two learned to overcome anything life throws at them and that life itself is precious and worth everything.





	1. Chapter 1

Synopsis  
Park Chanyeol was told he only had 365 days to live. From the day of his diagnosis on, he vowed to live his life to the fullest and live every day like it was his last. Byun Baekhyun was just an average person who was a victim of abuse and suffered from depression. With a bucket list, a puffer and each other, the two learned to overcome anything life throws at them and that life itself is precious and worth everything.

Started: 17/06/2016  
Ended: 17/08/2016  
Word count: 19 036

The snow was falling hard that day. It was January seventh. Park Chanyeol remembered it clearly; it was the day he was diagnosed with Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis. He had gone into the doctor's office for cold medicine after experiencing a really bad fever and cough.Shortness of breath and nausea had been present as well. His doctor, Kim Joonmyeon, had been concerned with some of the symptoms he had noticed and suggested Chanyeol take some tests. Of course, the 22 year old followed his doctor's instructions and went in for blood tests and a physical the same day. When the tests came back, Chanyeol knew there was something wrong. The look on the doctor's face told him so.  
"What is it. Please, just tell me."  
The doctor had a look of pity in his eyes. "I'm sorry. You may want to sit down for this. Do you have a parent or guardian you would like to call?"  
Chanyeol sat down on the uncomfortable plastic of the waiting room chair and said, "I'm 22 years old, I don't need a guardian. Just tell me what's going on!"  
There was a long silence and he could feel the eyes of patients on his back but he didn't care. "Alright," The doctor said. "Park Chanyeol, I am very sorry but you have Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis.” At Chanyeol’s confused look, he continued to explain. “What this means is that the tissue deep in your lungs becomes thick and stiff, or scarred, over time. The formation of scar tissue is called fibrosis.  
As the lung tissue thickens, your lungs can't properly move oxygen into your bloodstream. As a result, your brain and other organs don't get the oxygen they need.  
“ It seems to have progressed very far and spread throughout your lungs." There was a long pause before anyone spoke again. "I'm sorry but you only have nine months to live. A year at most."  
The doctor continued talking but Chanyeol had mostly tuned him out. How could he have Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis? He was healthy! He always had been! This wasn't right, Chanyeol could not have a lung condition. But there he was, in the hospital, a certified doctor telling him he had a year to live. Fifty-two weeks. Three hundred sixty-five days. 8 760 hours. The thought made Chanyeol dizzy.  
"We can discuss treatment costs at a later time but right now we should discuss the best treatment for you." The doctor-- whose name was Kim Minseok-- said. Chanyeol nodded, still in a daze but slowly recovering. Chanyeol got up and followed Dr. Kim into his office.  
Kim Minseok got right to the point. "Your disease has progressed very badly. It is mandatory that you remain here for treatment."  
Chanyeol was against it. "Not happening."  
"Mr. Park, I know that this is hard for you but you must make the best decision for yourself and your loved ones."  
"I don't have family, they died years ago and I am doing what is best for me." Chanyeol shot back, rising slowly to his unstable feet.  
Dr. Kim followed, "What is best for you is to remain here so you can receive treatment. If you don’t you may not get better."  
Chanyeol shook his head, his curly brown locks falling into his eyes. "I don't want to live the rest of my life in a hospital connected to machines and following the same daily routine." His voice cracked. "I-I want to go out and live. I want to die being able to say I completed everything I wanted to do."  
The doctor's eyes soften, albeit slightly. "I understand where you're coming from.” He let out a deep breath and sighed. Chanyeol felt his palms start to sweat. “At least take prescription medication to relieve pain and symptoms."  
Chanyeol sighed in relief."Thank you."

Now, almost four months later, Chanyeol stands in Busan. The busy traffic on the roads and bright lights shining, illuminating the night sky. It was so different compared to Muan, where Chanyeol had spent majority of his life. People rushed by in a blur and there was never a break in action. Taking a deep breath, Chanyeol took out his bucket list and looked at the activities scrawled under Busan. The very first activity written down was watching fireworks at Gwangalli Beach.  
Chanyeol neatly folded his list and placed it in his wallet, which then went into his backpack. Then, the tall male took off towards the beach in excitement and anticipation.  
It felt so exhilarating, running around Busan, seeing all the wonderful sights the city had to offer. Even at nine thirty at night, people were hustling about on the streets and roads. When Chanyeol arrived at the beach, he reached into his bag to get his puffer, which was now mandatory after long walks or physical activity. He shook it a few times before spraying the liquid into his mouth and breathing in, instantly breathing better. The beach was just as beautiful as he had imagined. The sky still held some light, seeing as it was almost spring but it was still hard to see and Chanyeol didn't want to step anyone so he took cautious steps to get further onto the beach where more people were gathering for the fireworks.  
The giant found the perfect spot a few moments later and sat down in the sand, feeling it shift under his weight and stray pieces getting caught in between his toes and fingers. Before getting diagnosed, Chanyeol hated sand; the way it stuck to him drove him crazy; but now he found comfort in the golden shore that was still warm from the sun shining down all day.  
Without warning, a loud boom sounded from above. There was an explosion of colour and as the firecracker sparkled, it's reflection in the water giving him goosebumps. The sound was carried over the ocean and resonated in the air. Surrounding Chanyeol were the gasps, laughs and sounds of general enjoyment. The sky was alight with colours and gold sparks that shimmered like stars. The fireworks continued before the grand finale took place.  
There were firecrackers everywhere, lighting up everyone and everything to the point where Chanyeol could practically see clearly, despite the previous lack of natural light. Slowly, as the sound echoed across the open area and the last golden sparks dissipated, the crowd roared with applause, Chanyeol making sure to be the loudest of all.

Baekhyun sighed as his older brother, Baekbeom smiled at him. "Wasn't that amazing?"  
"No. No it wasn't." The smile slipped off his brother's face as the words washed over him.  
"Why not?"  
Baekhyun scoffed. "Because I'm not a two year old! I'm 23! What 23 year old watches fireworks?" He ran a hand through his growing dark brown hair to brush it out of his eyes.  
Baekbeom smiled, thrusting his thumb towards himself. "This one!"  
"You're not 23." Baekhyun deadpanned and began to walk away from his older brother who shook his head in annoyance. Baekhyun heard footfalls behind him and started to walk faster.  
"I'm just trying to have a good time with my brother. Am I not allowed?" Baekbeom said bitterly. At that Baekhyun spun on his heel to face his brother, who was only a few steps away at that point.  
"Since when are you my brother? You never even acknowledged my existence until a few months ago!" Baekhyun snapped. Baekbeom looked hurt, his eyes widened as his mouth opened and closed; he couldn't think of a single thing to say to that.  
Byun Baekhyun turned and ran as fast as he could, knowing that his older brother would never catch up.  
The wind felt good against his face as he sprinted down the streets of Busan, dodging civilians on the streets. After a few minutes, Baekhyun turned to see if his brother was following him, never stopping or slowing down. All of a sudden, he felt a strong force bump into him, almost knocking him over.  
"Watch it!" He yelled, already annoyed. Baekhyun looked down and saw a man, around the same age as him, sprawled out on the floor in front of him. The shorter male looked in disbelief. This man was six feet tall and lean. How did Baekhyun, a skinny, five foot eleven, 23 year old knock this giant over.  
The tall boy sat up and gasped. He clenched his chest and a pained expression washed over his face. Baekhyun's expression softened from annoyed to concerned as the boy before him began to rummage through his bag, all the while gasping and wheezing. "Are you alright?" The shorter finally gave in, kneeling down before the panicking male. "What do you need?"  
The giant seemed to struggle to form words. He gasped and coughed before he could manage to form an actual word. "Puffer." He wheezed.  
Baekhyun understood right away and grabbed the bag out of the stranger's hands. He looked like he was going to protest but Baekhyun dumped his bag before he could, clearing out the entire thing in search of a little blue puffer. He looked through all the items that had fallen out of the bag and onto the concrete. Baekhyun finally found what he was looking for and thrust it toward the giant, who took it immediately; taking two breaths of medicine before sighing out in relief.  
The two stayed like that for a while, Baekhyun's palms sweating and the stranger still breathing harshly. "Are you alright now?" He asked meekly.  
The giant took a breath before answering. "Yeah, I think so." There was a small pause. "Thank you."  
Baekhyun waved him off. "It's no problem. It's actually my fault anyways, so..."  
The taller of the two shrugged before picking up things one by one and placing them back in his bag. Baekhyun cringed slightly, knowing he was the cause of this man's struggles. "I'm sorry. Let me help."  
"Alright."  
The two started putting things back into the taller's bag neatly. A piece of paper folded caught Baekhyun's eye. He reached over and unfolded the paper, curiosity getting the better of him. His eyes scanned over the title:  
Park Chanyeol's 3.6.5 Bucket List  
Baekhyun looked down in confusion. Why would a boy this age need a bucket list? It was odd. just as he was about to continue reading, the list was quickly snatched out of his hand.  
"Please don't read my things when I didn't give you permission." The boy-- Chanyeol, Baekhyun now knew-- said bitterly.  
The shorter blushed from embarrassment and continued to quickly shove things into Chanyeol's bag. When they were done, Baekhyun got up and extended a hand to help Chanyeol, who took it gratefully.  
"I'm sorry again," Baekhyun said.  
"It's really not a problem. It happens." The taller said. "And thank you." Chanyeol turned and began to head down the street.  
Baekhyun didn't know why but he really didn't want the man before him to leave just yet. His mouth moved before he could stop it. "Wait! Let me make it up to you!"  
Chanyeol turned around and smiled politely. "That's unnecessary but thank you for the offer." He turned to leave again but Baekhyun stopped him once more. It was like his mouth had a mind of it's own. "It don't even know your name!” He lied. “Let's go for coffee!"  
Chanyeol stopped and seemed to consider for a while. After what felt like an eternity to Baekhyun, Chanyeol turned around and smiled once more. "Alright."

A few minutes later. Chanyeol found himself in a café with a boy, who he now knew was named Byun Baekhyun, drinking the worst coffee he'd ever had. It was alright though, since Baekhyun was the one who'd paid.  
"So, Baekhyun, I hope you don't mind me asking but why were you running earlier?" Chanyeol asked, shaking his head to get the hair out of his eyes.  
Baekhyun hesitated before answering. What was there to lose? It's not like he'd ever see this person again. "I was running away from my older brother." At Chanyeol's confused expression, Baekhyun elaborated. "He dragged me all the way to a fireworks show, trying to prove that he was a good older brother. The thing is, he disappeared off the face of the earth after my parents got a divorce. He just came back a few months ago."  
Chanyeol didn't answer for a while. He didn't know what to say. "Oh." Was what he settled on. It was pathetic and probably made Baekhyun feel worse.  
Damn brain. Chanyeol thought. Why don't you work?  
Baekhyun shifted in his seat, feeling awkward. Maybe he shouldn't have said all that, since the latter seemed uncomfortable. "Sorry..." He mumbles meekly. "I shouldn't have ranted to you. I barely know you."  
Chanyeol shook his head politely. "It's alright." There was another awkward silence that seemed to stretch out longer than it probably was.  
"Why do you have a puffer? Do you have asthma?" Baekhyun asked.  
"Kinda." Chanyeol deadpanned. He left it at that.  
"Well, " Baekhyun said, breaking the silence. "This coffee is terrible."  
Chanyeol smiled a bit. He seemed to be troubled by something. Baekhyun noticed but didn't bother saying anything. After a few more minutes, Chanyeol finally gained enough courage and said, "Did you read it?"  
Baekhyun's forehead creased in confusion. "Read what?"  
"The list. The one that was folded in my bag?" Chanyeol explains, his dark brown eyes showing a little worry and insecurity.  
Baekhyun shook his head. "I didn't. I mean, I read the title but not the actual list."  
"Okay..." Chanyeol still looked anxious for some reason.  
"Why do you have a bucket list? It's not like you're going to die any time soon. You're still young." Baekhyun asked. His soft, dark hair fell into his eyes and he tried to blow his bangs out of the way while waiting for answer but gave up and pushed them out of the way.  
Chanyeol smile at the irony of the sentence. "You never know." He smiled and took another sip on coffee; he immediately regretted it as he swallowed what was in his mouth before gagging. Baekhyun looked at the taller male in awe.  
"What the hell is in this coffee? Dogfart?" Chanyeol groaned loudly.  
The two boys continued to talk until eventually, the coffee store closed and they were kicked out.  
They walked side by side, seeing as they were both heading in the same direction. It was silent, but this silence was comfortable.  
Then, Chanyeol stopped walking. "This is where I turn." He said, scratching the back of his head.  
"Oh. Alright then." Baekhyun said, turning and walking straight. "Bye Chanyeol, nice to meet you."  
"Do you want to exchange numbers?" Chanyeol asked suddenly, and his cheeks turned pink almost immediately.  
Baekhyun thought it over. If his brother looked through his phone, Baekbeom would be curious and ask a bunch of questions and that is the last thing Baekhyun wants. But then again, Baekhyun did enjoy his company. He decided to turn around and stick his hand out in silent demand of Chanyeol's phone. The latter obliged. When the two had exchanged numbers, Chanyeol smiled at Baekhyun once more.  
"Thank you for hanging with me tonight," He said. "I had a really good time."  
"Me too." Baekhyun nodded. "I'll see you around then." He turned and headed down the dark street, the night air becoming colder and people rushed to get home as fast as possible before midnight.  
Baekhyun walked a few more steps before waving to Chanyeol with a small smile.  
He was almost out of earshot when Chanyeol yelled, "Baekhyun, you look good when you smile. You should do it more often!"

Baekhyun returned home with the ghost of a smile on his lips, softening some of his features. Chanyeol seemed like a really great guy and Baekhyun couldn't help but enjoy his company.  
But the smile was wiped off his face as he entered his dad's house.  
The first sound Baekhyun heard was the sound of his father's angry voice, followed quickly by the disheveled tone of his step mother. They were fighting again. About what, Baekhyun had absolutely no idea but he didn't want to find out. As the two were fighting, the small brunet tried to creep up the stairs and past the arguing couple, whose shouts were getting louder and more aggressive by the second.  
He was almost there; the top of the stairs was only two steps away. But of course, life always found a way to make his life miserable. When Baekhyun placed his foot on the next step, the god damn floorboard creaked under the weight of his foot, the sound drawing unwanted attention. All of a sudden, he felt two sets of eyes glaring holes in his back.  
"Byun Baekhyun where have you been?" His father roared. "Curfew was at 11:30 with your brother; it's nearly half past one!"  
There was anger in his voice. He wasn't concerned for Baekhyun's well-being or why he was late. God, his curfew wasn't even really meant to keep him out of trouble, it was to ensure that his father wouldn't draw any attention to his dysfunctional family.  
Baekhyun shrugged in response to his dad's rage. He was getting his ass beat either way, he might as well go down with a fight. "I don't suppose you care?" He said, the sarcasm oozing out of his every word.  
His father saw red, Baekhyun guarantees it. He grabbed his son by the collar of his shirt and slapped him hard across the face. It stung really bad and Baekhyun's left cheek was starting to tingle. Tears welled up in his eyes but he held them back with all of his strength. Seeing the lack of reaction, the man raised his hand again and brought it down on his face. Baekhyun could feel the pain as his lip split open and blood began of trickle slowly out of the corner of his mouth, leaving the taste of iron on his tongue.  
Baekhyun's father pushed him away then, so hard the small male fell backwards onto the stairs. His step mother was staring intently at the scene before her. Baekhyun liked his step mother-- she never tolerated her husband's shit-- but when it came to things like this, where violence is involved, Baekhyun begged her that she stay out of it.  
Baekhyun could see the hate in his step mother's eyes, mirroring his own. He once asked why she stayed with a man such as his father, who was destined to rot in hell for the sins he'd committed. Her answer had kept him up for nights.  
"I care for you Baekhyun. You mean a lot to me, as if you were my son. If I were to leave him, I'd be leaving you too."  
What was probably meant as a comforting talk had Baekhyun feeling the exact opposite. His step mother was putting up with someone like him so that Baekhyun wouldn't have to suffer alone. For that, Baekhyun felt guiltier than he ever had in his entire life and he knew that nothing he would ever do could compare to what this lady had done for him.  
When his father had calmed his breathing, the man straightened up and turned to face his wife, who was still glaring daggers. "Go to your room Byun Baekhyun."  
Baekhyun scrambled away as fast as he could, sprinting up the stairs and into his room.  
Where the hell is Baekbom? Why didn’t he get his ass beat too? He asked himself. His cheek was throbbing painfully and tears welled in his eyes and even though he tried to stop them, they spilled over and ran down his pale cheeks.  
Baekhyun wanted to scream. He wanted to hide forever and never come out. He wanted to die.  
Weakly, the small male reached his hand into his dresser, fishing for a while until he found what he was looking for. When he pulled his hand out, in it was a silver razor. He stared at the small, shiny object, It looked harmless but could inflict so much damage in a small matter of time. It was Baekhyun's savior but it was also the one thing that would probably kill him in the end.  
Finally, he brought the razor down, onto the soft skin on his wrist, lined with veins and arteries.

Chanyeol collapsed onto his bed when he got home. It had been a long, tiring day filled with so many different experiences. He couldn't even help the large grin that broke out onto his face whenever he thought of a certain someone. Someone whose name started with a 'B'. Someone whose melodic voice was stuck on repeat in Chanyeol's mind. Some one whose beauty remained in his mind's eye. Someone whose smile, albeit rare, was pure and compassionate, full of emotion and by far the most mesmerizing thing the tall male had ever seen in his 22 years on Earth.  
This person was none other than Byun Baekhyun.  
Chanyeol glanced down at his phone, which was in his hand, and scrolled. He couldn't contain his excitement as he clicked on his contact list and found Baekhyun's number at the top. Chanyeol's heart throbbed in his chest but not in a painful way. It was a pleasant feeling over all.  
The brunet sat up slowly, reaching down off the side of his hotel bed to find his bag. When he found it, he pulled out a very familiar piece of paper, folded neatly into equal sections. He unfolded it and stared down at the list in his hands.  
His bucket list. He decided to write one after his diagnosis as a good way to end his life. Chanyeol grabbed a pen from off the nightstand and crossed out two things written on his list:  
Fireworks in Busan

 

Meet a new friend

Chanyeol folded the paper back into a square and placed it back into his bag. The giant layed back down when he was finished, his eyes drooping and soon he couldn't stay up any longer. The tall male fell asleep with a smile on his face and warmth in his heart.

Baekhyun walked into the bathroom when he was finished to wash away the blood that stained his arm. He knew that he would have to wear long sleeves for a long time but in that moment he felt it was worth it. He watched as the water, stained crimson, trickled down his limb and into the sink. Baekhyun waited until he was certain most of the bleeding stopped before drying it and covering the marks with a band-aid. He wouldn't want anyone to find out.  
When Baekhyun walked out of the bathroom, he found himself face to face with his father. The older male didn't even look at Baekhyun before pushing his son out of the way. The latter flinched away from his touch, shrinking into himself to avoid the man at any cost.  
When the brunet got into his own room, he looked at himself in the mirror on top of his dresser. There were dark, purple bruises along his entire left cheek, his lip cut and swollen. Byun Baekhyun could only think of one thing; what a disgusting creature.  
Tears began to well in his eyes and this time, he didn't try to hold them back. The spilled over his cheeks, stinging the small scrapes as they went down but Baekhyun didn't even notice. The small male returned to his bed and wrapped himself in his blankets, trying to hide from his dad, the world and himself. He fell asleep like that; crying in a bundle of blankets.  
A few hours later, he heard the sound of flesh on flesh. It was a terrible sound but one he'd grown accustomed to over the years. It was the sound of his step mother getting punished for whatever it was they were fighting about before. Baekhyun heard her cry out in pain as another smack landed somewhere-- probably her face. Baekhyun knew that his stepmother was strong and would fight back but they both knew that in the end, it would be useless. In the end, the cowards and the sinners always prospered against the selfless and the righteous.  
Squeezing his eyes shut, Baekhyun put his hands over his ears, blocking some of the sound out.

Park Chanyeol opened his eyes the next morning and felt refreshed. He felt happy and overall he was in a great mood. Maybe it was because of last night. He couldn't believe how much fun he had had in Busan and was excited to spend his last full day there. He would be leaving at noon the next day, heading for Dae-Gu to see The Ark and the National Museum. It was one of the more mature things on his bucket list and he was really excited. Although, he was sad that he wouldn't get to see Baekhyun much before he left.  
He glanced at his alarm clock on his nightstand and was shocked when he saw it was already 11:30. He should call Baekhyun and hang out one last time. He seemed like a really great guy and Chanyeol wanted to get to know him better. The tall male picked up his phone and excitedly called his new friend. The phone rang a few times and Chanyeol waited, albeit impatiently for Baekhyun to pick up the phone. After a few rings and still no answer, Chanyeol hung up and called again.  
This time, Baekhyun did answer Chanyeol.  
"Hello?" Baekhyun said, his voice sounding a little hoarse, but still pretty. Chanyeol couldn't help but to think that he would be a great singer. "Who is this?"  
"It's Chanyeol. We met last night."  
The other line was silent for a while before Baekhyun replied. "Ah, right. What's up?"  
Chanyeol smiled to himself as he replied, "I wanted to know if you wanted to hang out. Today is my last day in Busan so I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out for a little bit."  
"Sorry I can't today." Baekhyun replied, his voice turning a little more cold. Chanyeol was slightly taken aback. He ran his hand through his dark brown hair and tried again.  
"A-are you sure? I just thought that maybe we could--"  
"No, I'm sorry I can't go out right now." Baekhyun cut him off suddenly before hanging up on Chanyeol completely.  
The tall male sat on his bed staring at his phone in shock. He thought that Baekhyun was a nice guy but Chanyeol was beginning to second guess himself. Maybe Baekhyun didn't like him the way Chanyeol kinda liked Baekhyun. All of a sudden Chanyeol shook his head. Maybe Baekhyun was having personal troubles or was busy or was working and couldn't talk then and there. Yeah, that was probably it. There was no way that the Baekhyun he met only a few hours prior could change into a mean person.  
With a shrug, Chanyeol put his phone back into his backpack and headed to the bathroom to get ready for his day.  
When he emerged from the bathroom, he wore a white muscle shirt and an extremely tight pair of black skinny jeans. On his head was his favourite snapback. It was black and had the words EXO on the front. Exo was his favourite group and had been for the past four years and it was his dream to see them in concert some day.  
He slung his black bag over his shoulder and headed out to have fun on his last full day in Busan.

 

Baekhyun hung up and sighed. He wanted badly to see Chanyeol again, especially since it was his last day and Baekhyun may never see him again.Last night, he would have said yes hands down but now there was no way in hell he was leaving the house. He stood up from his desk chair and walked to the bathroom. He looked at his face in the mirror for a split second but couldn't force his gaze to hold. Baekhyun's left eye was swollen and his cheek was bruised. There was a small cut across the bridge of his nose but it was nothing compared to the gash on his lip.  
The small brunet felt his eyes fill with tears and quickly they slipped down his cheeks and fell onto the ground by his feet. Baekhyun moved his hand up to his mouth to cover any noise that came out as he sobbed. Soon, his knees gave out and Baekhyun fell to the ground, a sobbing ball of injuries and sadness.

Chanyeol decided to go to the farmer's market downtown. It seemed like a lot of fun since there were never many farmer's markets in Muan-- nothing big anyways. The giant stepped out of the cab after paying the fees and stared at the sight before him in awe. In front of him was the famous Busan farmer's market. It really was as stunning as the pictures he'd seen on the internet. There were rows upon rows of white tents, each blocking hard working farmers and their crops that were being sold from the hot sun. It was the end of April and the hot May weather was already rolling in. There were also bands and choirs that were singing and playing happy tunes as people walked by. Chanyeol knew how to play guitar but he hadn't touched one in years so he probably lost his talent.  
The first thing he decided to do was look for food. Chanyeol looked over all of the items that looked so ripe and fresh. He passed by a small tent that was selling fresh fruits such as grapes and apples. He stopped to look at the fruit. It looked really good since Chanyeol hadn't had anything to eat since he left that morning. Not to mention, apples were Chanyeol’s absolute favourite. His stomach rumbled loudly and Chanyeol could feel himself blush in embarrassment when the farmer looked over and chuckled.. Quickly taking money out of his bag, he handed it to the man at the stand and bought two apples. They were red and looked delicious. The man who had been selling the apples wrapped them and handed the two fruit to Chanyeol along with his change and smiled. "Have a nice day."  
Chanyeol smiled back. "You too!"  
As he continued walking, Chanyeol took his puffer and inhaled the bitter medicine, immediately biting into a fresh applet. It was sweet on his tongue and rid his mouth of the foul taste that was there previously. The tall male smiled as he walked down the street lined with tents, all thoughts of Byun Baekhyun gone from his mind.

Baekhyun sighed as he looked at his face once more. He'd put his mother's concealer on his bruises and eyeliner to pull attention towards his eyes, but there was nothing he could do about the cut on his lip. The short male decided to just screw it and he pulled his black snap-back over his head, hoping to hide his face. Baekhyun was clad in a tight black, near see-through long-sleeve shirt and a tight pair of black skinny jeans that showed off his hips in a nice way. He had to admit, although his face was a mess, his body was still pretty damn hot.   
Baekhyun left the house in hopes of getting away from his father for a few hours. He decided to go to Luxion, the best nightclub in town. The small male wasn't usually a party-person (more like a party-pooper) but he needed a distraction and thought of no other options. Besides, nightclubs were dark and crowded so the odds of people really seeing his face were low. It was a win-win... sorta.  
He left a few minutes later, around ten pm, walking down the busy street.

Chanyeol stepped inside and stared. It was unlike anything else he'd ever seen. The music boomed, the bass shaking the entire building as people all but screamed to be heard over the loud sounds. The lights that were shining down on the dance floor were bright and flashed in a fast pattern, making him slightly dizzy. The last thing he noticed was the smell of alcohol that polluted the air. Chanyeol had never been to a nightclub before, albeit he is twenty three and was one of the most popular guys in school before he dropped out. He just never found the idea of dancing and drinking in a public place filled with strangers appealing.   
He didn't know where to start, so Chanyeol walked over to the bar and ordered his first drink, and by first, he didn't mean first drink of the night. He meant the first drink of his life. It was nothing too extravagant, just a simple beer, but it was special for him. The bartender took his order and returned a few minutes later with a glass in his hand. He was a little intimidating. The man wasn’t as tall as Chanyeol- few people were- but he was certainly stronger and more broad. He was covered in tattoos and had three piercings on his face. Chanyeol took his drink and thanked the man, thankful when he left to tend to someone else. The tall boy brought the glass to his lips and took a small sip. He almost gagged. It really did taste as bad as it smelled. The bartender laughed at his reaction from a few feet away. Chanyeol hesitated before taking another sip. Then another. After a while, the taste became more bearable. Finally, after drinking almost the entire glass, Chanyeol found he was actually beginning to like the taste. He finished the glass and ordered another. He drank the second one more quickly than the first, not wasting any time as he downed the thing. It kinda burned his throat though, swallowing such large quantities so fast.  
When that beer was done, he decided to try something else. He looked around for inspiration. The guy beside him had a tiny glass of what Chanyeol assumed was tequila. The giant had heard many things about tequila, mostly bad. But you never know unless you try, right?  
He looked at the bartender. "Can I have a shot of tequila?"   
The bartender nodded and came back a few minutes later with Chanyeol's drink in hand. "Here you go."  
"Thank you." Chanyeol stared at the little glass in his hand. It couldn't hold that much alcohol, really. It was like a little baby cup. Raising the shotglass, Chanyeol took it all in one sip, like he’s seen his old college roommate, Jongdae, do before.  
The tall male swallowed and grimaced. The person beside him snorted. Why did everyone laugh at the poor giant? Chanyeol flushed in embarrassment. "Jesus, I thought that the beer was strong."  
A few shots later, Chanyeol was drunk. Like, shitfaced. Hammered. Wrecked. To the point that he actually started dancing. The tall male with lanky arms and legs, clumsy habits, obnoxiously happy personality and loud voice who was just about as graceful as a turtle, was dancing at a club. The lights on his face made him feel even more cocky as he flailed his arms around in what he thought was a cool manner. It wasn't. After a while a few girls started dancing with Chanyeol, giggling and practically grinding against him. When one of the girls got a little too close, Chanyeol backed up. "Sorry," He slurred. "I swing the other way, if you know what I mean."  
The girls looked at each other and shrugged before continuing to dance, less intimately this time. Chanyeol was done dancing though, as his breathing wasn't doing so good. Even in his drunken state, he knew when it was time to stop. As he made his way back to the bar, someone caught his eye. That someone was sitting down where he was sitting before he left to dance almost fifteen minutes ago. They were wearing a near see through black shirt and a pair of skin tight jeans. Chanyeol looked down quickly. He wanted to slap himself. The words came out before he could stop it. "Nice ass."

Baekhyun didn't turn around when he heard someone with a deep voice hitting on him. He couldn't blame them, he had a nice ass. Instead, he took another swig from his glass before saying, "That ain't the only nice part of me." Sure, he wasn't drunk yet but Baekhyun needed something to take his mind off of things, even if that meant hooking up with a random stranger at some bar in downtown Busan. It wouldn't be the first time.  
"Oh yeah?" The deep voice sounded from behind him and an arm wrapped itself around his waist. The voice sounded a little familiar. "And how can I know you're not lying?"  
Baekhyun turned to the guy and smirked. "I'll prove it to you." He said seductively and bit his lip. The short male didn't look at the man's face, he was too distracted by his outfit. He was wearing a tight white wifebeater, showing off his sculpted abs and arms, skinny jeans that weren't as tight as Baekhyun's but still clung to his skin and a black snapback that hid most of his eyes.   
"Oh really?" the stranger said, pushing his hat out of his eyes, removing the shadow that had previously his his face. That's when the smirk fell off of Baekhyun's face and he sat there in shock as realisation dawned upon him. The guy who was hitting on him was none other than Park fucking Chanyeol. The same person who he'd blown off without so much as an explanation.  
And he was hammered.   
"Chanyeol?" Baekhyun called out to the male in front of him who was smiling like a madman. Upon hearing his name, Chanyeol looked down at Baekhyun, a confused look on his face. After a few moments, his face brightened up and the taller of the two snapped his fingers.   
"Baekkie!" He said, almost shouting over the loud music. "Well long time no see!"   
Baekhyun cringed as Chanyeol slurred his words and all the smaller could smell was alcohol. "Chanyeol, how much did you drink?"  
The said male just shrugged and answered, "I don't know. Two beers and maybe five or six shots?"   
Baekhyun sighed and placed his hand on Chanyeol's arm, trying to convince him to follow the shorter (or to steady him. Well, really a mix of both). "Come with me." Chanyeol did follow him, stumbling and tripping over his own feet until he realised that Baekhyun was pulling him towards the exit. Then, the giant stopped in his tracks, almost yanking Baekhyun backwards. He crossed his arm and pouted.  
"I don't wanna go yet!" The taller whined. "I just got here like, half an hour ago!"  
"And you're already drunk." Baekhyun shot back in slight annoyance.  
Chanyeol shook his head, looking like a kicked puppy. "I’m not! Only buzzed!" His brown hair had fallen in his eyes and now he was focused on blowing the hair out of his face. Baekhyun had to admit that he looked really cute like that. The shorter shook his head. Now was not the time for thoughts like that.  
"Yeah, buzzed my ass. Let's go before you do something you'll regret." God knows I've done it a thousand times, Baekhyun thought. He didn't know Chanyeol well but he knew him well enough to know that he was a decent-- no, a good human being and he didn't deserve to make the same mistakes he'd made.  
Chanyeol crossed his arms in annoyance. "Big words for someone who ditched me today." He said bitterly. Baekhyun immediately felt angry. Chanyeol had no idea why he hadn't went with him that day; he shouldn't assume. Baekhyun's grip tightened on Chanyeol's arm, but then he stopped himself. Chanyeol was just drunk. A drunken asshole who didn't know what he was saying. With a sigh, Baekhyun loosened his grip and said, "What'll make you leave with me?"  
Chanyeol smirked, "Someone seems to like me." He replied cockily, then seemed to think about his options. Then, he let out an evil chuckle that sent chills down Baekhyun's spine. What had he gotten himself into?  
"Have a shot with me." Chanyeol said.   
Oh, that's all? Baekhyun thought to himself. "Alright. But we're leaving as soon as I take the shot, okay?"  
Chanyeol nodded in agreement. With a sigh, Chanyeol walked back to the bar, followed by a drunken Chanyeol. When they got there, the bartender greeted them and Baekhyun ordered two shots. A few moments later, a shot glass was in his hand. He downed it in one go and hid a smile when he saw Chanyeol staring at him in awe. Then, he turned to the latter and said, "Your turn."  
Chanyeol also drank it all at once, but the effects on him were far worse. He made a face and coughed a few times before settling back down.   
"Can we leave now?" Baekhyun asked. Chanyeol nodded in defeat. The two finally made their way to the door, Baekhyun holding onto Chanyeol so the latter wouldn't fall over, now that he was considerably more drunk than before.   
Once they were outside again, Baekhyun looked at the taller male, who was now almost leaning on him fully. "Where do you live?"  
"It's on that street by the restaurant." Chanyeol replied groggily.  
"Oh, wow. Aren't you just so helpful."  
"Don't sass me."  
Baekhyun sighed. "Well then, where are we supposed to go?" He was getting fed up and people were giving the two strange looks.   
Chanyeol shrugged. "It's called the EPIK Motel."

Almost a half an hour later, after walking all over downtown Busan to find the goddamn place, Chanyeol and Baekhyun finally made it back to the taller's motel room. When they got to the door, Chanyeol fumbled with the key card for a little as Baekhyun watched on in mild amusement while Chanyeol stared at the thing in his hands with annoyment. Then, Baekhyun took the card out of Chanyeol's hand and opened the door himself.   
Once inside, Baekhyun dragged the giant to his bed, a mess of white blankets and pillows piled on top of a small mattress. Chanyeol flopped down gratefully, finally back in bed. He closed his eyes immediately while Baekhyun went to the washroom.   
When the brunet came back out, the taller was sitting up in bed, his eyes half closed and Baekhyun could tell that he was tired. He approached the tall male sitting cross legged and sat beside him. "Why don't you go to bed?"   
Chanyeol just ruffled his brown hair and shrugged. "I need to take my puffer. And my medicine..." He slurred and trailed off slightly at the end.  
"Alright, then take your medicine." Baekhyun deadpanned.  
Chanyeol looked up at him with a pout, his messy hair almost covering his eyes. "I looked for it while you were in the bathroom but I couldn't find it."   
The shorter boy sitting on the bed sighed before getting up. He looked around the room before his eyes fell upon Chanyeol's backpack. "Did you check your bag?" Baekhyun asked. The other just shook his head. So, with a slight frown on his face, the shorter male walked over to Chanyeol's bag and emptied it out, much to the the latter's dismay. But eventually, Baekhyun found a blue puffer and three orange bottles filled about halfway with pills, each bottle containing a pill of different size and colour. Why does he need this many pills?   
Deciding it was better not to mention it, Baekhyun walked back to the bed with the pills in hand. Then, he dropped the bottles and the puffer on Chanyeol's lap. "I'll go get you some water." He was just about to turn and leave but Chanyeol grabbed his wrist.   
"It's okay, I don't need water. I'll just take them dry."  
Baekhyun raised a questioning eyebrow. "Are you sure?"   
Chanyeol nodded his head. With a shrug, the shorter sat down on the bed next to Chanyeol and watched in awe as he swallowed all the pills dry at once. Then, the drunken male held the puffer to his lips and took a big breath, inhaling the medicine. It tasted pretty nasty but at that point, Chanyeol was almost used to it. With a content sigh, Chanyeol lay back down on his bed, not even bothering to take off his shoes.   
"Yah!" Baekhyun kicked Chanyeol lightly with his foot. "Park freaking Chanyeol, at least change. You smell like beer and sweat and it's gonna stink up the room."  
The taller male didn't reply, instead just he just groaned and rolled over so his back was facing Baekhyun. The said male just rolled his eyes. He was about to kick Chanyeol again when he heard the male snoring.   
"Are you kidding me?" Baekhyun scoffed and stood up. He walked over to the door and was about to leave when he looked back at Chanyeol once again. He was still fully clothed and Baekhyun was sure that the sleeping giant would have a serious hangover the next day. With a shake of his head, the brunet walked back to Chanyeol and began to undress him. First he took of his shoes and threw them on the floor, then he moves onto his socks, shirt and pants. When Baekhyun managed to take off the taller's clothes- with the exception of his underwear- he rolled Chanyeol over and pulled back the covers before rolling him back again and tucking him in, throwing the comforter onto the disheveled boy.   
Then, he turned to actually leave when he felt a hand clasp onto his wrist. Baekhyun flinched, not expecting the action and whirled around. Chanyeol's eyes were cracked open and he was sitting up. "Baekkie, can you stay here?"   
Baekhyun was about to say no; the words were on the tip of his tongue but something stopped him. He was most certainly late and curfew was a good two or three hours ago and if his dad was up he was going to get in much more trouble than the previous night. It wouldn't hurt to stay for the night, would it? No, Baekhyun decided, it wouldn't. "Okay, I'll stay."   
Baekhyun walked towards the couch, taking his jacket off and kicking his shoes from his feet. Then he took a blanket from out of the closet and laid it over the couch. It wasn't that warm, more like a sheet than a blanket but Baekhyun didn’t complain. He looked over at Chanyeol, who was now sleeping soundly in his bed. He smiled a little before lying down. In a few minutes, the two boys were asleep.

“Never again.” Chanyeol moaned as he leaned the dirty motel toilet. Baekhyun was by his side, a hand on his back. He didn’t know what he felt more of; pity or the urge to laugh. On one hand, the kid was drunk off his ass and had one hell of a hangover. On the other hand, the kid was drunk off his ass and had one hell of a hangover. But, since laughing at someone you barely know as they throw up at eight in the morning probably wasn’t a good idea and would probably get him thrown out. So, instead, Baekhyun rubbed Chanyeol’s back as he heaved. “Why would you let me drink so much?”   
Baekhyun raised an eyebrow. “I did try to stop you. You made me drink instead, remember?”   
Chanyeol groaned at the thought, his head pounded. Baekhyun did giggle a little. The taller male glared at him and Baekhyun held his hands up in surrender.   
When Chanyeol was certain he would be able to stand, he slowly made his way out of the bathroom, followed by Baekhyun. “I’m going to make you breakfast. What do you want?” He said as he headed to the ‘kitchen’- which was also the dining room and the bedroom- and opened the fridge. The taller shook his head.   
“Baekhyun, you don’t have to do this. You’ve already done so much for me!” Chanyeol closed the fridge gently. “Let me make you breakf-” he cut short and his eyes widened. His mouth opened and closed like a fish. Baekhyun’s eyebrows creased in confusion at the taller’s reaction. Then suddenly, Chanyeol’s hand was on his cheek and there was a slight sting. The brunet hissed and pulled back. Realisation hit him in the gut. Baekhyun’s hand went to his bruised cheek and scratched lip.  
“Baekhyun, what happened?” Chanyeol asked, his voice laced with genuine concern. He reached his hand out to pull Baekhyun’s away, immediately forgetting his hangover.  
The injured male pulled back. “It’s nothing.” Baekhyun said with a tone cold as ice. He turned back to the fridge and reopened it. It wasn’t really a fridge since it rested on the counter and was only big enough to hold two meals worth of food. He ripped the eggs out of the mini fridge and put them down on the counter.   
“That’s not nothing, Baekhyun. How did that happen?” Chanyeol demanded, his voice growing demanding. He reached out to grab onto the injured male who was milling around the small space, ignoring Chanyeol’s words and avoiding his touch. He managed to grab onto Baekhyun’s wrist, effectively stopping the shorter male. “How.”  
Rage bubbled inside of Baekhyun, threatening to explode and pour out. “It’s none your damn business! And what about all of your pills? Why do you take more pills than an old man?” He said, his voice raised as he ripped his arm out of the other’s grasp. They stood there in silence, eyes locked, tension thick in the air. Finally, Chanyeol looked away with a small sigh. “Alright, it’s not my business but don’t ever, ever bring those up.”   
Baekhyun felt slightly guilty as he watched Chanyeol walked over to his bag and pulled out a bottle of pills and his blue puffer. He came back and placed the medicine on the counter. Then, he took the eggs and a pan from under the stove. “How do you like your eggs?” He asked, monotonous voice drifting in the air. Baekhyun didn’t answer. He was too stubborn for that. Instead, he stood still, arms crossed over his chest.   
When he got no answer, Chanyeol just shook his head and grabbed two eggs, cracking them both and putting them in the hot pan.  
A few minutes later, Chanyeol put a plate on the counter. On the plate was eggs (sunny-side-up), bacon and toast. “There’s orange juice in the fridge if you want it.”   
Turning off the stove, Chanyeol took a cup from the shelf above the stove and filled it with water. Then, he picked up the long-since forgotten pills and popped one in his mouth. When he swallowed it, inhaled his puffer and finished the water. When he looked over, Baekhyun was staring at him. The two locked eyes for a second and Baekhyun looked away first. “Don’t waste my food, Baekhyun. I’m not rich, you know.” Chanyeol said.   
The said male hesitated. He wasn’t mad anymore but he was stubborn. However, he didn’t want to waste food. Finally, Baekhyun gave in and took the plate. Chanyeol handed him a plastic fork and knife and he accepted it. The brunet dipped the toast into the egg yolk and took a bite. He was on his third or fourth bite when he noticed Chanyeol wasn’t eating. Swallowing his pride, Baekhyun asked, “Are you not eating?”  
The tall male shook his head. “Are you kidding?” He said incredulously. “I would throw up before it hit my stomach.” Chanyeol grimaced at the thought.   
Baekhyun chuckled a little, the ghost of a smile on his lips. “You should still try to eat something. Here,” He stabbed a piece of egg on his fork and held it out towards the other. “Eat this.”   
The tall male looked hesitant as he considered Baekhyun’s offer. He really didn’t want to throw up again. Chanyeol was just about to decline the offer when the small male pushed the piece of egg into his mouth by force. Startled, Chanyeol opened his mouth and Baekhyun let the fork go. It was hanging out of his mouth as he stared at Baekhyun, who was laughing loudly. It was a pleasant sound to Chanyeol’s ears and he found himself laughing too. A minute later, when the laughter died down, Chanyeol glanced at the clock. Damn, it was ten already? With a sigh, he stood up. “Hey, today is my last day here. I have to be out of here by eleven.”  
Baekhyun’s smile faltered. “Oh.” There was a pause. “Where are you going?” He asked.   
Chanyeol shrugged. “I was planning on going to Dae-gu, since it’s only five or six hours away but who knows?”   
The shorter nodded. It was a little sad, to think that this may be the last time Baekhyun would ever see this person. It wasn’t like he had feelings for Chanyeol but he definitely enjoyed his company. “Do you need help packing?”   
Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun, shocked by the offer but he smiled and nodded. “If you don’t mind, that’d be great.” 

Exactly an hour later, Chanyeol was completely packed. He and Baekhyun walked out of the motel together and the taller male returned the key to the room. “So.”   
Baekhyun looked up. “So.”  
Chanyeol held out his hand. Baekhyun took it. “It was nice to meet you, Byun Baekhyun.”  
“You too, Park Chanyeol.”   
The said male opened his old pickup truck’s driver’s side door and hopped in. He closed the door and started the engine. There was a lurch in Baekhyun’s chest. He swallowed around the lump in his throat. Chanyeol just started to reverse out of his parking spot when Baekhyun suddenly ran towards the diver’s side window. “Wait!” He didn’t know what came over him but he didn’t want Chanyeol to leave. Or, he didn’t want Chanyeol to leave without him. Chanyeol stopped and rolled down the window.   
“C-can I… I mean would you mind if…” Baekhyun paused to organise his thoughts. “Could I go with you? Just to Dae-Gu. If you don’t mind.”  
Chanyeol smiled brightly, all of his teeth showing in a grin that reached his eyes. “I don’t mind at all.” 

Baekhyun was pleasantly surprised when Chanyeol agreed to allow Baekhyun to accompany him to Dae-Gu. It was a spur of the moment decision and his mouth had begun to move before his brain could catch up. Whether it was a good thing or not, Baekhyun would find out soon enough. 

Since Baekhyun hadn’t packed anything in advance and all he had were the clothes on his back from the previous night- which smelled of booze and sweat- Chanyeol agreed to let him go home to grab some things before they left. Since it was a Sunday, Baekhyun’s father wouldn’t be home until twelve. His stepmother would be at work all day, so as long as the short male managed to grab everything he needed in thirty minutes or less, he would be able to leave without being caught.   
Baekhyun instructed Chanyeol to his house and when they got to the small condo, the brunet hopped out of the car and jogged up the three steps to the front door. It was unlocked, as usual, so he pushed it open and went to his room, not bothering to take off his shoes. As quickly as he could, Baekhyun yanked out his suitcase from his closet, unzipped it and threw in most of his clothes. He also managed to fit three pairs of runners, a pair of sandals and black combat boots into the small space that was left.   
When he was done, Baekhyun hauled his suitcase down the stairs and was about to leave when he felt a wave of guilt wash over him. Turning around, Baekhyun went to the kitchen, found a piece of paper and a pen and scribbled down a note addressed to his stepmother. The note read:  
Stepmother, thank you so much for everything. I’m leaving today with a friend. You don’t have to worry about me, I’m safe. You can leave him now.   
With the note completed, Baekhyun folded the paper and placed it on the stove, where he knew his stepmother would see it. Then, without so much as a glance at what he was leaving behind, the small male pulled his suitcase out and placed it into the back of Chanyeol’s truck before hopping in himself.   
He didn’t know if this was a mistake; driving to Dae-Gu with a near-stranger. Baekhyun didn't know if he was going to regret it. All he knew was that he was going to get away from that hell hole of a house and the idea alone made him nervous and giddy. It was a good feeling- one he hadn’t felt in way too long.

Chanyeol was squirming with excitement. Byun Baekhyun was really interesting and cool and funny. The giant was so happy when they started driving out of Busan, he started drumming with his fingers on his steering wheel, humming along to the song in his head.   
However, no matter how delighted Chanyeol was, he couldn’t get his mind off of the bruise that covered the cute brunet’s cheek and the split lip. He wanted answers but he couldn’t pry. No way would he make his new friend feel uncomfortable, even if he was beyond curious and frustrated.   
Chanyeol thoughts were interrupted when Baekhyun tapped his arm lightly. It was a soft touch but it still made an unexpecting Chanyeol jump out of his seat. He would have laughed, but seeing as they were just about to head onto the highway, it gave the giant a mini heartattack.   
Baekhyun, however, seemed to think the situation was hilarious. He had his hand pressed over his mouth to muffle any sounds. “Sorry,” He said. “I was just wondering if I could turn on the radio?”   
Chanyeol normally didn’t listen to the radio when he was driving- he often got distracted, but since there was nothing else to do, the latter nodded and turned the radio on. Baekhyun mumbled a quick thanks before taking control of the radio, channel surfing until he found a station that played rock and heavy metal. Immediately, the small brunet started humming along to the song on the radio. The song was really something different. The electric guitar was shrill and the drums were overpowering. The vocalist was even a vocalist really. He alternated between a half-talk-half-rap and a scream.  
Chanyeol really didn’t like it much- or at all- but since Baekhyun seemed to be enjoying himself, he let the latter listen to his music.   
About two or three songs later, a song that Chanyeol recognised came on. It was in English, which was surprising since it was a Korean station, but Chanyeol didn’t complain. He liked the song a lot. When the opening verse of Valentine’s Day by Linkin Park came on, Chanyeol sang along under his breath. Baekhyun noticed and a small smile formed on his lips. He cocked his head to the side and Chanyeol smiled a little at the other’s cute, almost puppy-like tendencies. “You like Linkin Park?” He asked, his hair falling in his eyes. He looked up at Chanyeol expectantly, as if the taller’s answer would be exciting. It wasn’t but the expression never left Baekhyun’s face.  
“Yeah. Linkin Park is the only English band I listen to. Them and Radiohead.” Chanyeol replied. He liked Radiohead more though. He learned how to play Creep on guitar a while ago and it’s still his favourite song to play. Well, it would be if he had brought his guitar along.  
Baekhyun’s eyes lit up a little. “What’s your favourite Linkin Park song?” He asked.  
Without missing a beat, Chanyeol answered. “Numb. Numb is amazing.”  
“I love Numb, too!” Baekhyun replied cheerfully.   
The two continued to talk until dinner time and Chanyeol could honestly say that it was the best time he’s had since he was diagnosed. It was better than the fireworks, better than the scenery, better than every single restaurant and store he’d visited. 

After dinner (hamburgers from some random drive-thru), the duo got hit the road again. Curiosity was ebbing inside of Baekhyun. Ever since he saw the bucket list, he’d been eager to know why Chanyeol had a bucket list. Chanyeol also took a lot of medicine. The thought had been pushed to the back of his mind but now that he was in a car with nothing to do, he found himself thinking about it a lot. He would ask but the taller was so defensive about the list. Baekhyun had only seen the list once and Chanyeol had gotten mad at him for looking. So instead, he settled on staring out the window, letting thoughts run through his mind, one after the other. Soon, Baekhyun could barely keep his eyes open as the car raced down the highway. 

Chanyeol looked over at the small male sleeping with his face pressed against the cold car window and his knees tucked into his chest. It looked uncomfortable but Baekhyun seemed to find it snug as he snored quietly. But regardless of how relaxed he looked, every now and then when his cheek would press too hard to the window, or his lip bumped into his knee (that was only a few centimetres away from his face at that point), Baekhyun would flinch, just barely soft enough to keep him from waking up. His eyebrows would crease too, lips forming a frown. It worried Chanyeol and he bit his lip in concern, a habit he’d picked up years ago from his mother. With a small, almost inaudible sigh, the giant turned off the highway and into Dae-Gu at three in the morning. He wondered if Baekhyun would be staying with him throughout the roadtrip. It seemed nice but Chanyeol knew he was being unrealistic; a stranger he didn’t know probably wouldn’t be willing to travel Seoul with someone he didn’t know. How old was Baekhyun anyways? He didn’t look too old but he was at a bar so clearly he was older than twenty. Chanyeol would be in so much trouble if he accidentally kidnapped a high schooler. The idea made the taller male shiver and he made note to ask Baekhyun his age before the police knocked on their door.

When the two arrived at the motel they would be staying at, Chanyeol woke Baekhyun up by shaking his shoulder lightly, but when that didn’t work he ended up having to pinch the poor boy’s nose until woke up for lack of better idea. Baekhyun jumped awake, startled and stared at Chanyeol, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “Are we in Dae-Gu?” He asked tiredly.   
Chanyeol nodded once with a bright smile. “Yeah, we are. I’ve already checked in so we just have to unpack.”   
With a small nod, Baekhyun stepped sleepily out of Chanyeol’s truck, stumbling a little before grabbing his suitcase from the trunk with a grunt. His arms felt like jelly and his legs were tingling with pins and needles from being in the same position for too long. Baekhyun pulled the handle up and rolled his suitcase to the main entrance, thankful the suitcase had wheels. Chanyeol was right behind him, keycard in hand as he wheeled his own suitcase. Swiping the card through the lock and waiting for a click, the taller male took Baekhyun suitcase and pushed the door open, then wheeled them both into the closet. Although he’d been startled at first, Baekhyun stepped inside the room and uttered a small “Thank you.”  
This room was no different from the other. The walls were an off-white colour, though it was most likely faded from age rather than a choice in paint. The blue carpet felt rough and hard under Baekhyun’s feet when he kicked off his shoes by the front door. He wasn’t fond but he didn’t voice his opinion.   
Baekhyun walked farther into the small room and saw a kitchen, probably the smallest one he’d ever seen, consisting of a mini-fridge, a microwave above that, a stove and oven, and a one-toast toaster. Baekhyun didn’t even know they made toasters like that. Just past the kitchen was the main area. It wasn’t much. There was one bed, probably the size of a double. Across from the bed was a small couch facing a box TV in the very corner of the room.  
Chanyeol was standing in front of Baekhyun, looking down at the floor as a blush rushed up his face and painted his ears pink. “Baekhyun,” He practically mumbled. “When I booked this room, I didn’t know that there would be more than one of us. So there’s only one bed and I don’t know what you wanna do.”   
The tall male was practically from embarrassment now and his words trailed off and slurred at the end, making Baekhyun strain to hear.   
“That’s fine. I can just sleep on the couch.”   
“Oh.” Chanyeol looked up, his expression impossible to decipher. “Okay.”  
Baekhyun tilted his head at the taller’s strange behavior. He was about to ask if anything was wrong but he was interrupted before the words left his mouth. “How old are you, by the way?” Chanyeol asked.  
“I just turned 23 in May, why do you ask?” Baekhyun watched as Chanyeol’s mouth open and closed like a fish. “Is that strange?”  
“That makes you older than me!” Chanyeol practically shrieked.   
The older cocked an eyebrow. “Is that bad? How old are you?”   
Chanyeol, his eyes still wide, answered in a loud voice. “I turn 23 in November! That makes you older than me! But you look so small!”   
Baekhyun put his hand over his chest and gasped in mock-animosity. “I am not small.” He said. Although his actions were playful, his tone was anything but, filled with venom and hostility. No one called Byun Baekhyun small and got away with it.  
Chanyeol noticed and immediately reprimanded. “I’m sorry. You’re not small, I’m just big.”   
Baekhyun may just have to let this one off the hook. “Like your ears.” He muttered as an afterthought. Revenge was a dish best served cold. 

When the two had finished unpacking most of their belongings, it was already four-thirty a.m and Chanyeol was dead-tired from driving. He plopped down on the bed after changing into his pyjamas and closed his eyes. Baekhyun did the same on the couch, but he wasn’t as tired as the former so he turned on the TV for a while and watched a comedy bit with the volume down most of the way. Chanyeol was so tired and wanted nothing more than to sleep but his chest was tight. He had taken his pills and puffer while he was in the car so he knew that he was okay in that sense, however the longer he tried to sleep, the more the feeling intensified. Opening his eyes, Chanyeol looked and saw Baekhyun still awake on the sofa. His chest contracted once more at the sight of the small male. With a sigh, the tall male sat up and padded over to the couch, sitting down next to Baekhyun.   
The said male glanced over at him when Chanyeol sat down. “What’s wrong?” He asked.   
“I couldn’t sleep.” Baekhyun nodded in understanding. Silence fell upon them as they watched the show. It was weird, but so was every other show that aired so late it was probably considered early. After a few minutes, Chanyeol felt his eyes begin to close. He tried to keep them open and fight the fatigue but his eyelids just felt heavier and heavier with each minute that passed. Giving in, the tall male closed his eyes and let sleep wash over him.

Baekhyun flinched when he felt weight dropped onto his shoulder. He looked over and saw Chanyeol, face merely inches away from his own. A slight blush crept up his face and tinged his cheeks a rosy pink. The taller was sleeping, his face completely relaxed and vulnerable. His breathing was coming out in even breaths, although from time to time it would sound strained. Baekhyun knew that Chanyeol had a puffer and took medication but he didn’t know what for. He looked down at the scarcely younger boy and felt a pang in his chest. Baekhyun didn’t know what it was but it felt strange. It wasn’t pain but it didn’t feel good. It felt like snakes in his stomach and a hand around his heart.   
He didn’t know what came upon him, but he felt the urge to get closer to the taller. Without so much as a second thought or hesitation, Baekhyun lifted Chanyeol’s head lightly and repositioned the boy on his thighs, like a pillow. He felt the taller sigh when he was lying down. It made Baekhyun blush harder but instead of pushing Chanyeol away, the brunet ran a hand through the giant’s auburn mop of hair. His slight curls felt tangled in Baekhyun’s fingers but slowly he worked the bigger knots out. It was comforting and soon after, Baekhyun let himself drift off to the sound of Chanyeol’s breathing and the show still quietly playing on the TV.

Chanyeol woke in the morning with a content sigh as he sat up and stretched his arms above his head. His back cracked as it realigned from sleeping in such an odd position all night and it felt really nice. He looked to his left and saw that no one was there. He could have sworn that Baekhyun was beside him when he fell asleep last light. Standing up to stretch out his legs, Chanyeol noticed that the small male wasn’t on the bed behind him either. Panic set in when he couldn’t find the brunet in the bedroom-living room. “Baekhyun?” He called out, his voice still hoarse from sleep.   
“I’m in the kitchen.” Came the said boy’s answer a few seconds later and Chanyeol could feel the tension leave his body. The tall male made his way to the small kitchen and found Baekhyun leaning over the stove with a pan in his hand. He had changed into blue jeans and a white tee-shirt. His brown hair was combed and hung over his forehead, just barely out of his eyes. He was also barefoot. All in all, Baekhyun was really cute.  
“What are you doing?” Chanyeol asked as he came up to peer over the smaller’s shoulder. In the pan were three eggs, still goopy and translucent.   
Baekhyun shrugged. “You made breakfast for me the yesterday, so I thought I’d return the favour.”   
Chanyeol looked at the contents in the pan again, feeling a pang in his chest. “You didn’t have to do that.” He mumbled, a blush spreading across his cheeks. The smaller just looked at him and cocked an eyebrow.  
“Would you rather make your own food?”   
“N-no! I was just surprised, that’s all.” The giant amended.  
Baekhyun smirked a little. It wasn’t really a smirk; only the left corner of his mouth twisted up albeit slightly. It made the small male look more mysterious and dark. “Well, the eggs will be ready soon so find somewhere to sit.”   
Chanyeol did as he was told and settled down on the couch at the foot of the bed. His backpack was there, sitting on the floor a few feet away. Remembering the pang in his chest, Chanyeol reached down and grabbed on through his bag, tugged open the stubborn zipper and dug around. When he felt what he was looking for, the brunet took out his puffer, out it to his lips and inhaled. It still tasted pretty bad.   
Chanyeol put his puffer back in his bag and noticed a very familiar piece of paper on the floor. He picked it up and opened it. Just as he thought, it was his bucket list. It probably fell out when he was looking for his puffer.   
Chanyeol looked at the section that read Dae-Gu. Scrawled in messy writing beneath it were the places he wanted to visit. The first on the sub-list- that contained three activities- was The Ark. Chanyeol had no idea what it was really, but he knew that it was a big tourist attraction. It seemed pretty cool too, the pictures online all very pristine and futuristic, almost. But alas, Chanyeol thought, It’s three hours away. He decided that instead of doing the events in order, the giant would head to the closest attraction and work his way farther. That meant that Chanyeol would visit the Dae-Gu National Museum first. Admission wasn’t expensive, maybe 15 000 won at most. He could probably afford to bring Baekhyun along. Chanyeol smiled at the idea.  
Busy in thought, the tall male didn’t even notice that Baekhyun had walked in until he was right in front of Chanyeol, two plates in his hand containing eggs, bacon and a piece of toast each.  
The said male handed a plate to Chanyeol, who took it gratefully and placed the plate over his list, trying to hide it from view. If Baekhyun noticed, he didn’t say anything and sat down beside Chanyeol, to the latter’s left. He handed the taller a fork and began eating his own food.   
Chanyeol thanked Baekhyun once more and began to eat. He picked up his fork and stabbed a piece of egg white, lifting it to his mouth. Just as his lips closed around the fork, he tasted it.   
Salt! So much salt! Chanyeol tried to hide his grimace as the salt crystals shifted on his tongue, coating the inside of his mouth. He swallowed the egg and looked at the other boy. Baekhyun’s egg was already half done! How could he eat those salty eggs?   
“These taste good,” Chanyeol lied. “Did you put anything on it?”   
Baekhyun paused shoveling food in his mouth to answer, “Just a little bit of salt.” Then he dipped his bread into the egg yolk and took a bit bite. Chanyeol cringed and did his best to repress the shudder.   
Just a little salt, my ass.  
Then he heard something that sounded like laughter emanating from his left. Chanyeol looked over and saw Baekhyun with the back of his hand pressed to his mouth. His shoulders were shaking and his eyes were slightly crinkled. He was laughing.  
“You planned this, didn’t you?” Chanyeol demanded, throwing his fork down onto his plate in exasperation.  
Baekhyun stopped laughing, and looked up, staring Chanyeol in the eye. “Planned what?” He asked innocently. The boy managed to keep the smile off his face for another two seconds before he was laughing again. “I-I really don’t know what you mean.” He giggled.  
“You ass.” Chanyeol said, but there was no sting behind his words. The taller found himself smiling too. 

Three weeks passed and the bruises on Baekhyun’s face were gone, but the questions remained. Chanyeol thought about it a lot, how the smaller got the cuts and bruises. He wanted to ask but didn’t want to make the other upset again. So instead he ignored his thoughts and built up enough courage to ask Baekhyun to join him on his road trip. It had been the last day in Dae-Gu and Baekhyun had packed his stuff before Chanyeol even woke up. When the latter did manage to get out of bed, however, he was met with a fully-dressed Baekhyun standing with his suitcase by the door. It had been four days since the two had been together and they had visited every place from Dae-Gu on Chanyeol’s bucket list, although Baekhyun didn’t know that. “Where are you going?” He had asked. Baekhyun had looked at him and shrugged.  
“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll take a train back to Busan. It won’t take too long and it’s not that expensive for an express ticket.”  
Chanyeol shook his head and stood up. “A-are you sure you want to leave?” He had asked. “You can come along with me… If you want, that is. I don’t want to kidnap you or anyth-”  
Baekhyun interrupted him with a small chuckle. “If you don’t mind, then I don’t mind.”  
That is how the two ended up together, three weeks later, on their way to Dangjin. There wasn’t anything too special in Dangjin, really but apparently the food was good and there was a decent farmer’s market.   
The two arrived in Dangin at around noon and immediately headed for lunch. They decided to go for cold noodles since the weather outside was scorching hot and neither Baekhyun or Chanyeol wanted boiling hot soup. The two sat down and the lady came and took their order shortly after. Baekhyun ordered the watermelon spicy noodles and Chanyeol ordered the original mul-naengmyeon. While they waited for the noodles to come, the two began to converse to kill time.   
“So the farmer’s market is only a few minutes away. Maybe we could drive there after lunch?” Chanyeol asked his friend. He really thought that he and Baekhyun had become really good friends over the past few weeks and Chanyeol felt really happy whenever he was with the smaller. His chest still constricted occasionally and it concerned him. The feeling of snakes in his stomach happened whenever they brushed hands or their feet would touch under the table. It wasn’t too unpleasant or anything of that sort, it was just strange and unsettling.   
His thoughts were cut short when Baekhyun nodded in agreement. “Alright. Sounds like a plan.”   
Minutes later, the noodles arrived and the lady showed Baekhyun how to eat the melon-noodles. Chanyeol didn’t fail to notice how the older woman would lean forward and brush arms with the brunet or ‘accidentally’ bump into Baekhyun with her… ehem… chest area.   
When the lady left, Chanyeol’s cheeks were red. Whether it was from embarrassment or frustration, he didn’t know. He looked at Baekhyun and the later just smirked his signature smirk and cocked an eyebrow. “Why are you so flustered?” His tone was mocking and oozing with sarcasm.   
Chanyeol just shook his head. “Because I just witnessed a fifty-something year old woman feeling up my friend.” The giant picked up the metal chopsticks and brought the cold noodles to his mouth. They tasted amazing. They were cold and refreshing and spicy and just awesome.   
“She wasn’t feeling me up!” Baekhyun contradicted with a small scowl on his face.   
Chanyeol smiled brightly, his left eye twitching slightly. “She was so.”   
“Well, at least someone wants to feel me up.” Baekhyun shot back, the scowl gone and replaced by a small smile. Not a smirk, not a snicker, not a leer. A genuine smile. Chanyeol loved it when Baekhyun smiled. His eyes would crinkle and his mouth would twist up and it was just so breathtaking. There was a pang in Chanyeol’s chest, strong, powerful and pleasant. 

After lunch, the two held true to their word and headed for the farmer’s market. The apples that Chanyeol had bought at the previous market were gone. Baekhyun was shocked by how many apples the tall male could consume in a week. That’s why at every city they stopped, Chanyeol would drag Baekhyun to the farmer’s market and buy apples and other things that caught their eyes.  
This farmer’s market wasn’t exactly the best Chanyeol had ever been to, but it was really cheap. After walking the entire market twice, the two left with two or three bags of produce and candy and just food in general.   
Chanyeol got back into his truck and started the engine as Baekhyun tried to figure out the most effective way to fit everything in the trunk without everything flying out the minute they got back on the highway.   
Suddenly, Baekhyun was at the window, rapping his fingers on the glass. Chanyeol rolled the window down for the shorter male, who was standing on the nerf bars to make eye contact with the tall male. “Do you want any snacks for the ride or anything like that?” Baekhyun asked. “I’m taking candy and maybe the carrot.” He shook the carrot in his hand for emphasis.  
Chanyeol chuckled. Baekhyun had bought the world’s biggest carrot for 1 000 won. It was crazy cheap and the small male basically threw his money in the farmer’s face and demanded the biggest carrot he’d owned. “I’ll take an apple or two.”   
Baekhyun rolled his eyes and bit off the end of his carrot. “Of course you’ll take an apple.”

Lately, Chanyeol noticed, his heart did this fluttering thing whenever he was around Baekhyun. If the older would make a joke, or laugh or smile, his heart would beat crazily in his chest. His palms would sweat too and it was all just so overwhelming. 

Chanyeol realised he liked Baekhyun when they were at the motel room in Incheon. Incheon was one of the most exciting places to visit, aside from Seoul, which was the next stop on the road trip. The two were going on a picnic. The food was packed and Baekhyun and Chanyeol were walking through Incheon Grand Park, looking for a place to sit. When they finally found a place that seemed quiet enough, the two boys sat down and set up.   
The lunch was kimbap and bulgogi that Baekhyun and Chanyeol had made the day before. The older boy set everything down on the blue blanket that Chanyeol kept in his truck in case of emergencies that way strewn on the grass. He put the food on two plates and handed one to the giant that was sitting with his legs crossed. Chanyeol took the plate and started eating the beef first, since it was his favourite type of meat. Baekhyun started with the kimbap, taking small bites.   
“Hey, Baekhyun” Chanyeol caught the said male’s attention. “You know you’re supposed to eat it all in one bite or else the roll will fall apart.”  
Baekhyun looked at the taller incredulously. “It will not. I used sticky rice.”  
Chanyeol shook his head. “That doesn’t matter,” He tried to reason with a stubborn Baekhyun. If past experiences were anything to go by, then he was certainly going to lose. “It’ll still fall apart when you bite into it.”  
Baekhyun shook his head, and then, to prove his point, he took a rather large bite. When the kimbap stayed in one piece, Baekhyun smirked and waved the roll around in the air. “Told you so.”   
But Chanyeol wasn’t paying attention. All he could focus on was the grain of rice on the brunet’s lower lip. He wanted to kiss it off him. The thought made his cheeks red and he could feel the blush turn his ears red.   
Baekhyun noticed and stopped bragging. “Yeol?” He asked. Chanyeol’s heart stopped when he heard the nickname come from the smaller’s mouth. “Are you okay?” Baekhyun reached forward and pressed his right hand to Chanyeol’s forehead and his left hand to his own.   
“You’re hot, Yeol.”   
“So are you.”   
The words were out of his mouth before he even knew what he was saying. Baekhyun was looking at Chanyeol with wide eyes, his own blush slowly creeping up his face. Neither of them moved. “I-I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking-”  
Baekhyun pulled back and smiled. “Took you long enough.” He said and pulled his hand away. Chanyeol reached up just in time and grabbed his wrist, pulling the older forward until their lips were only inches apart. Baekhyun sucked in a breath  
“What would you do if I kissed you right now?” Chanyeol asked.  
“Kiss back.”  
Chanyeol closed the distance between them with a chaste kiss. 

Baekhyun realised he liked Chanyeol when the taller fell asleep in his lap. His heart did this thing where it jumped into his throat and made him feel giddy and happy. Even though the way they met was strange and always would be, Baekhyun wouldn’t have had it any other way.

A few nights later, Chanyeol and Baekhyun were lying in bed, sweating because the air conditioner in their room didn’t work. The covers were kicked to the foot of the bed and Chanyeol had opened the window as far as it would go (which isn’t very far). Baekhyun was already asleep, tired from their long day. Thankfully, it was their last day in Incheon and they’d be heading to Seoul the next day.   
Frustrated and hot, Chanyeol stood and walked over to the sink, filled a cup with cold water and chugged it. How Baekhyun was sleeping in this blazing heat was unknown and Chanyeol was jealous.   
He was just about to put the cup down and join his boyfriend when he heard something. It was coming from Baekhyun himself, whimpers and grunts. Not in the usual, almost puppy-like way. Baekhyun sounded distressed. Then, without warning, the brunet started sobbing in his sleep, kicking and screaming and thrashing on the bed.   
Chanyeol was by his side in a second, holding Baekhyun close even as he pushed the taller away. He cooed, telling Baekhyun he was safe and he was okay. Then, Baekhyun's eyes opened and he saw Chanyeol holding him to his chest. Tears stained his shirt and there were scratch marks on his arm; nasty red lines against pale skin.   
Chanyeol was shushing him, telling him that it was just a dream telling him how much he cared for the smaller. Baekhyun looked up and met Chanyeol’s eyes, a sob escaping from his lips and he clung to the taller for dear life.   
Soon, the tears stopped. He was still shaking and his breath would hitch. Shortly after, those stopped too. Chanyeol was rubbing soothing circles on his back, running his fingers through his hair and holding him close.   
“Are you okay?” His voice was laced with concern.   
Baekhyun nodded, not trusting his voice. “Do you want to talk about it?” Chanyeol asked. There was no demand behind those words; nothing making him feel like he had to tell his boyfriend.  
The brunet nodded, tears filling his eyes as he recalled the nightmare. He didn’t know where to begin. “I… I dreamt that I was back at home.”  
Chanyeol ran his fingers through his hair again, twisting the soft locks between his fingers gently. “Why is that bad?”   
Baekhyun took a deep breath. “Because my dad was abusive.”   
Silence fell upon the two, thick and heavy. It felt like a weight had been added to Baekhyun's shoulders.  
After all, who would ever want someone broken?  
But then Chanyeol’s hand moved to his chin and lifted his face gently. “Is that where those bruises came from?”   
It was such a long time ago, almost three months, but Baekhyun remembered it clear as day. For the first time in three months, the latter wondered about his stepmother. Did she finally gain the courage to leave that wretched man? What about Baekbeom? Did he even know Baekhyun was missing?   
The thoughts that raced through his mind brought more tears to his eyes. Chanyeol hugged Baekhyun even tighter, comforting things whispering in his ears.   
Neither got much sleep that night.

Since then, Baekhyun had opened up to Chanyeol about his past. Little by little, the giant was tearing down all the walls the brunet had built. But in doing so, Chanyeol was also putting Baekhyun back together again, little by little. Or so he thought.

A month had passed since Baekhyun’s sudden nightmare and since then, the brunet had woken up every night in cold sweat. It helped that Chanyeol was there to hold him every time, whispering sweet, comforting things in his ear. But even if it did help, Baekhyun couldn’t help but feel useless. He felt anger and sadness and just general frustration. That night was different, however.   
It was half past midnight in Seoul, but there were still people on the streets, walking past the hotel and cars zooming by at full speed. Chanyeol was lying down in the double bed, the covers pulled up to his chin. Baekhyun noticed that the tall male was always cold and shivering. His breathing would always hitch and grow shallow. He said that he had asthma and that it affected his breathing at night.   
The shorter male looked at the bed warily, not trusting himself to sleep. If he slept, Chanyeol lost sleep. Instead, the walked to the giant’s side, leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. Chanyeol was surprised, his cheeks and ears dusted with pink. Baekhyun didn’t like kissing or hugging or holding hands or when they did do something even remotely intimate, Chanyeol felt giddy and awkward. The older noticed and chuckled before flicking the former’s forehead gently. “I’m going to use the washroom and come right back.”   
Chanyeol hummed and nestled back into the blankets, shivering a little.  
Baekhyun walked into the small washroom and sighed, locking the door behind him. The bathroom in this hotel was full of colour; the walls were pink with the exception of one blue wall, there was a purple rug by the toilet and even the sink was yellow. Although, that was probably due to age rather than choice. The mirror was one of those cabinet mirrors, meant to save space.   
Baekhyun opened it and moved a few things around- mostly his makeup and Chanyeol’s hair products. Underneath a bottle of hair gel, the small male found what he was looking for. It was a razor. A perfectly sharp, metal razor that Baekhyun bought when the nightmares started.   
Without hesitation, Baekhyun brought the razor down to his wrist. It wasn’t like the books and movies described it to be. It didn’t feel good when the object slid across his pale wrist, leaving a trail of blood in its wake. As a matter of fact, Baekhyun thought that it hurt like a bitch. But it made him feel in control. For once, he had the power to control the size of the cut, the force of which the blade cut his skin. He had jurisdiction of his own pain and that was what made Baekhyun continue cutting. It wasn’t his father hurting him; it was himself.  
Red blood ran down his arm and pooled in the sink, leaving streaks along the edges. As more blood continued to drain out of his body, there was a knock on the door. Baekhyun froze. “Baekhyun, are you okay? You’ve been in there a while.”   
“Y-yeah,” Baekhyun tried to keep his voice neutral. If it wasn’t, Chanyeol didn’t comment on it. “I’ll be out in a minute.” The former quickly flushed the toilet and turned on the sink, rinsing his arm in cold water. The blood ran down the drain and diluted until it was almost orange. Then, with the sink still on, Baekhyun pressed toilet paper to the fifteen even cuts he made across his flesh. The bleeding wasn’t going to stop anytime soon but it had slowed considerably. After another two or so minutes, the brunet walked out of the bathroom and headed for his suitcase. If he could pull out his black hoodie, his arm would go unnoticed.   
Luckily, Chanyeol was in bed again, his eyes drooping and he clearly wasn’t paying attention to Baekhyun as he made his way across the room, hiding his arm behind his body. He took out his thick black hoodie and pulled it over his head.   
Baekhyun made his way over to the bed, lying down beside his lanky boyfriend and snuggled against him.   
That night there were no nightmares.

Chanyeol noticed something about Baekhyun. Every night, he would go to the washroom before bed and he would stay there for a long time. It was disconcerting, especially when the tall boy would go to use the bathroom and smell iron in the air.   
One night, Baekhyun had locked himself in the bathroom again. Chanyeol couldn’t take it anymore. He had a bad feeling and a theory about what Baekhyun was doing; he just hoped he was wrong.  
Chanyeol placed his hand on the door and twisted the doorknob, surprised to find it was open. The tall male took one last, deep breath and pushed the door open all the way.   
He was scarred by what he saw.  
Baekhyun was leaning against the sink, a blade on the counter next to him. The smell of blood was strong in the small room, making Chanyeol dizzy.   
“Baekhyun,” He said, his voice not showing his anger. “What are you doing?”  
The said male looked up and noticed Chanyeol standing there, eyes wide and tears threatening to fall. Baekhyun panicked, not knowing what to do. He’d never been caught cutting before. He looked at his boyfriend in horror. “I swear, it’s not what it seems.” Baekhyun had no idea what he was saying. “I-I’m sorry.”   
Chanyeol looked down at the older male’s wrist. It had cuts up until maybe halfway to his elbow. There was no blood, although the cuts still looked new. The taller took a step forward, then another and another until he was beside the smaller. Chanyeol took Baekhyun’s hand gently in his own, careful not to hurt the smaller’s wrist. He counted the lines on the other’s arm, making sure not to miss a single cut. Twenty-seven. Chanyeol looked at the razor that rested beside Baekhyun’s. Slowly, he picked up the blade in his right hand and held out his lift wrist so that it was perpendicular to his body. Then, he dragged the metal across his own flesh. He hissed when he felt the pain radiating on his skin.   
“What are you doing?” Baekhyun panicked. “Are you crazy?” He reached out for the razor but Chanyeol pulled back, glaring at Baekhyun. The latter froze, the glare colder and more unforgiving than anything the brunet had seen in his entire life.   
When Chanyeol saw that Baekhyun stopped moving, he continued, slicing line after line into his skin. Soon, by the sixteenth cut, his arm was numb. He looked up at his boyfriend and saw that he had tears in his eyes. Chanyeol was about to cut again when Baekhyun grabbed his wrist softly. “Please,” He mumbled. “Please stop.”   
Chanyeol threw the razor in the trash can and looked at Baekhyun. “Do you understand how much it hurts to see someone you care so much for doing something so harmful to themselves.”  
Baekhyun nodded frantically. But Chanyeol wasn’t done. “Do you see how terrible to see someone you care so much for in pain? Or wishing that they could die. Do you understand how horrible it feels when you feel like you weren’t enough of a reason for them to stay?”  
Baekhyun choked back a sob and hugged his boyfriend, pulling him close. “I’m sorry,” He cried. “I’m so sorry.”   
Chanyeol felt tears in his own eyes as well. He let out a shaky breath and hugged his boyfriend back. “Promise me you’ll never do it again.” His voice wavered and cracked. He sounded so sad that Baekhyun couldn’t control his own voice anymore as he cried aloud, sobbing and shaking and sniffling.   
“I swear I’ll never do anything like that again. You are more than enough of a reason for me to keep on living.”

September was just around the corner. It had been almost nine months since Chanyeol diagnosis and he was getting scared. He was always tired and needed to use his puffer frequently. Not to mention that he would sometimes become out of breath just by walking up a flight of stairs or down the street on a tour.   
Even if all of the effects were becoming more and more noticeable, the worst part about was Baekhyun didn’t know. He didn’t know that Chanyeol was sick and dying. What if he fell apart on day and needed to go to the hospital? What if he died in his sleep next to Baekhyun and the smaller was left with no answers? That thought scared Chanyeol more than death itself.   
He never understood when he heard people say some thing are worse than death, but now he understood clear as day.  
Chanyeol decided he would tell Baekhyun that day.   
Since the two had decided to stay in Seoul for a month before going to the next place on their list so they could visit whatever they wanted, they had only made it to Donghae-si. The two had just returned from a long day at the Donghae Mureung Festival and were exhausted. Baekhyun was sitting on the bed, munching on a chips that he’s bought from a gas station on their way back.   
Chanyeol walked over and sat beside his boyfriend, hugging him close to his chest. “Hey, Baekhyun.”   
The said male turned his head and looked up at the younger. “What’s up?” He asked, sensing the seriousness in Chanyeol’s tone.   
“I have Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis.” The words were barely coherent, as the tall male spoke so quickly and slurred his words together, but Baekhyun had heard him.   
Fear quickly fell upon him, forming a lump in his throat. Taking a deep breath, Baekhyun forced the words out. “What does that mean?”   
Chanyeol looked into his eyes, tears evident as they shone against the motel room’s dull lighting. “I’m dying.”   
Baekhyun sat up straight. “Yeol, that’s not funny.”   
The said male looked at the brunet dead in the eye. “I’m not joking. I have a lung disease, a fatal one. The doctor told me that I’d only have nine months to live, a year at most.” Chanyeol’s voice never wavered, never cracked. He sounded determined and strong despite the information he was trying to convey.   
Baekhyun’s eyes widened and he felt his own tears burning in the back of his throat. “Please, stop kidding around.” But he knew that Chanyeol wasn’t lying. He never lied, not about matters that had to do with life and death.   
Chanyeol pulled him back into his arms and stroked Baekhyun’s back, ran his hands through his hair, telling him that he’d be okay.  
“I-is that why you had the bucket list?” Baekhyun sobbed. “And the medicine and the puffer?”   
Chanyeol hummed in acknowledgment, not trusting his voice. 

Chanyeol realised he loved Byun Baekhyun when he found out that he’d been cutting. It broke his heart and made him sick to his stomach for weeks after the horrific event. His heart throbbed whenever he thought about it and he wanted nothing more than to hold Baekhyun for the rest of his life, however long or short that may be. 

Baekhyun realised he loved Chanyeol the same night. He realised that he always felt safe, even after a nightmare. He realised that he could speak freely around Chanyeol. He realised that he liked to hold and be held by the younger male more and more than anything else, he realised that he, Byun Baekhyun, felt a strong pang in his chest, the feeling of fear, pain and sadness when Chanyeol pressed that blade to his own wrist to prove to Baekhyun that his life was worth living.

The two tried their best to continue traveling, but Chanyeol kept getting sicker and sicker. Soon, it was too hard for him to walk from the bed to the bathroom. That’s when Baekhyun decided it was time to go to the hospital.   
Chanyeol was reluctant at first, not wanting to spend the last months he had cooped up in a room connected to machines. But Baekhyun convinced him it was for the best. Eventually, Chanyeol gave in. That’s how Park Chanyeol ended up in a hospital back in Seoul, connected to a heart monitor, a respiratory machine at his side at all times.   
Baekhyun sat down on his bed, never leaving his side. Chanyeol would apologise for being in such a position and making Baekhyun waste away precious time. Every time he said anything along those lines, Baekhyun would silence him with a kiss and assure him that he wanted to stay with Chanyeol, if he didn’t he would have left a long time ago.   
One night in late October, a few days before Halloween, Baekhyun was lying down next to Chanyeol, resting his head on the taller’s chest. He was listening to the latter’s heart beat, his laboured breaths and the beeping of the machines that’d become a part of their everyday lives. “Baekhyun,” Chanyeol looked down, his voice hoarse. “I love you.”   
Baekhyun looked up at the taller, tears welling in his eyes, a small smile on his face. “I love you too.”

Baekhyun looked really nice, Chanyeol decided. He looked nice when he slept, his face open and relaxed. He looked nice when he was being serious, eyes dark and powerful. He looked nice when he was scolding Chanyeol for something and his eyebrows creased in frustration. But, Byun Baekhyun looked the best when he smiled, his eyes forming crescents and his perfect teeth showing. Byun Baekhyun looked the best when he was laughing, looking as though he had not a care in the world. Byun Baekhyun looked the best when he was happy.

Chanyeol and Baekhyun celebrated their first Christmas together. The tall male had lost so much weight and was deathly pale all the time, Baekhyun was concerned the taller would catch cold. The brunet stacked blanket on top of blanket atop the sick boy until Chanyeol was just a head in a mass of cotton.   
“Baekhyun, I’m fine.”   
Baekhyun shrugged. “Still,” He mumbled, “Better to be safe than sorry.”   
Chanyeol laughed a little, but the laugh turned into a coughing fit so violent, it shook the taller’s whole body. The entire time, Baekhyun was sitting beside him, hugging Chanyeol to his chest as that was the only thing he could do.   
When the fit passed, Chanyeol looked up at Baekhyun with sad eyes. “Sorry, I couldn’t stop it.”   
Baekhyun cupped the taller’s face in his hands and pressed his lips against the other’s in a chaste kiss. “Don’t be sorry. You should never feel sorry about this,” Baekhyun cleared his throat, feeling the now familiar burn of tears. “This isn’t your fault, it never has been and it never will be. I still love you, it doesn’t matter that you’re sick because you are still the same Park Chanyeol that I fell in love with.  
“So please,” Baekhyun sniffled as a tears ran down his cheek. Chanyeol reached up and brushed it away with his thumb gently. “Don’t ever be sorry.”

Less than a week after New Years, Chanyeol woke up with a gasp, a searing pain resonating in his chest. Baekhyun jumped up as well and immediately took notice of Chanyeol’s condition. “Nurse! Doctor!” He called.  
Chanyeol’s breathing became rapid, he was barely sucking in any air at all. For some reason, it was so easy to get air out of his system but near impossible to get any back in. Soon, nurses and doctors were inside, fussing around the tall male, moving Baekhyun off to the side. He stood in shock and watched as the doctors and nurses fussed around the person he loved most in the world. Then, through all of the people whirring around, he saw as Chanyeol’s eyes closed and he fell back against the bed. There was so much noise that Baekhyun couldn’t hear the heart monitor. He didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.  
It felt like an eternity later when a doctor pulled a shaking Baekhyun into the hallway away from Chanyeol. The doctor was named Kim Jongin. He looked really young, possibly younger than Baekhyun or Chanyeol.   
“I’m very sorry Mr. Byun, but Park Chanyeol’s condition is deteriorating quickly.” Jongin paused, seemingly searching for the right words. “It seems that his heart is failing due to lack of oxygen in his bloodstream. We managed to bring him back once but I’m afraid that we may not be able to do it again.  
“We suggest you say your goodbyes. Park Chanyeol may not make it through the night.”  
Baekhyun knew this was coming. He had prepared himself for the day both he and Chanyeol knew would come sooner rather than later. But that didn’t make the news any less painful.

Almost an hour later, Baekhyun was allowed back in Chanyeol’s room. He opened the door and sat at the foot of the taller’s bed. He took a moment to look at the younger. Even though he was pale, his hair was messy and he was considerably skinnier than when they first met, he was still the same beautiful Park Chanyeol with lively eyes and the world’s most contagious smile.   
When Chanyeol noticed Baekhyun, he smiled and patted the spot beside his bed softly. Baekhyun made his way over and sat beside the younger, tucking his head under Chanyeol’s chin. He felt the tears in his eyes spill over and fall down his cheeks. Baekhyun’s shoulders shook as he tried to control his breathing. “I love you.”   
“I love you too.”  
Baekhyun smiled, looking Chanyeol in the eyes and kissed his lips. Their lips fit together perfectly, thin ones against fuller ones, smooth against chapped. The brunet pulled back first with a sigh. 

Chanyeol wasn’t afraid of dying anymore. Baekhyun taught him that some things in life are worse than death. Things like watching the person you love get hurt and in turn hurt themselves.   
He knew that he was going to die. He rejected treatment when he first found out, treatment that could have saved his life, even if the chances were low. But if he had decided to do the treatment, he would never have met Byun Baekhyun, the amazing, strong and absolutely wonderful human being who took Chanyeol’s heart in exchange for his own. 

Baekhyun and Chanyeol fell asleep that night. Baekhyun was exhausted from the night’s events and wanted nothing more than his lover to be alive when he woke up. He wanted Chanyeol to make it through one more day. But instead, the taller male woke Baekhyun up with a gentle nudge.   
Baekhyun sat up, concern laced in his every movement. “Yeol, are you okay?” He asked.   
Chanyeol nodded. Really, he wasn’t; the pain in his chest intensified tenfold and it took all of his will to keep from crying out in pain. “I just wanted to tell you I love you, Baek. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.”  
Baekhyun smiled, his heart throbbing in his chest. “I love you so much, Yeol.”  
Chanyeol smiled back when the older grabbed his hand and rubbed circles with his thumb. The pain was excruciating but the fact that Baekhyun was smiling made everything okay. His smile, albeit rare was genuine and pure.  
“Baekhyun… You look beautiful when you smile. You should do it more often.”   
Baekhyun’s mind went back to their first meeting. 

"Do you want to exchange numbers?" Chanyeol asked suddenly, and his cheeks turned pink almost immediately.  
Baekhyun did enjoy his company. He decided to turn around and stick his hand out in silent demand of Chanyeol's phone. The latter obliged. When the two had exchanged numbers, Chanyeol smiled at Baekhyun once more.  
"Thank you for hanging with me tonight," He said. "I had a really good time."  
"Me too." Baekhyun nodded. "I'll see you around then." He turned and headed down the dark street, the night air becoming colder and people rushed to get home as fast as possible before midnight.  
Baekhyun walked a few more steps before waving to Chanyeol with a small smile.  
He was almost out of earshot when Chanyeol yelled, "Baekhyun, you look good when you smile. You should do it more often!"

Then, Chanyeol laid back down, taking Baekhyun with him. The brunet just closed eyes when he heard the heart monitor beside him give out one last, shrill beep that went on for eternity.   
Doctors were in the room in no time. Baekhyun was dragged out of the room, into the hallway. The door to the room as closed and the short male was left in the hallway by himself. Except now, he was truly alone.

Kim Jongin was true to his word. They tried for almost fifteen minutes but to bring someone back from the dead not once but twice was near impossible.   
Baekhyun was in shock. Most of the words that were leaving the doctor’s mouth went in one ear and out the other. He couldn’t even find it in himself to cry. All of his tears were gone.

Chanyeol was buried in a cemetery in Seoul in mid-January. Baekhyun had been the only person at the funeral. As it turns out, Chanyeol’s parents were both dead, they died in a car crash when Chanyeol had been sixteen. Baekhyun didn’t know any of Chanyeol’s friends contact information, or if he even had friends at all. But with a personality like Park Chanyeol, how could he not?

Three Months Later  
Baekhyun ended up buying an apartment in Seoul so he would be able to visit Chanyeol as often as possible. He also managed to get into Ajou University in Suwon to study medicine. Baekhyun would be a resident in a year. Until then, he also worked at a bookstore a few block away from his apartment.   
One sunny Saturday afternoon, Baekhyun decided to stop being lazy and unpack the last remaining boxes. There were only two or three, but the brunet never got a chance to even open them since he was so busy with school and work. But seeing as he had the whole weekend off, Baekhyun decided he would unpack everything.   
He opened the first box and sighed. It was filled with books. About a month ago, Baekhyun’s stepmother tracked him down and sent him all of the things he couldn’t take with him when he left with Chanyeol. Baekhyun asked about her and Baekbeom. She said that she was now divorced and happier than ever, now that she knew that Baekhyun was safe and doing so well. Baekbeom, on the other hand, had disappeared again just after Baekhyun.   
The short male sighed. Some things never changed.  
When he finished putting all the books away, it was already one thirty in the afternoon. It had taken an hour for Baekhyun to reorganise his bookshelf so that it was in alphabetical order after all the new additions.  
Baekhyun walked back into the livingroom of his apartment and knelt next to the second box. Using scissors, he cut the tape that sealed it shut.   
Inside the box were all of Chanyeol’s things.   
Baekhyun felt tears pooling in his eyes. All of Chanyeol’s old clothes and his phone and his backpack. The brunet picked up the black bag and heard a thud. Chanyeol’s brown leather wallet fell onto the floor. Baekhyun reached to pick it up when something caught his eye. There was a slip of paper inside the wallet.   
Baekhyun set the bag down and grabbed the slip of paper out of Chanyeol’s wallet. It was folded into equal sections. The small male quickly unfolded the paper and read the top line.   
Park Chanyeol's 3.6.5 Bucket List  
Baekhyun smiled when he read over the list, reminded of everything the two had done together.

Go to Busan  
Farmer’s Market  
Fireworks  
Go see the Arc in Dae-Gu  
Visit the National Museum in Dae-Gu  
Go on a picnic  
Make a new friend  
Get drunk  
Get a tattoo  
Go swimming  
Learn to swim  
Baekhyun was about to put the list away when he saw something written messily at the bottom of the page. His heart stopped when he realised it was a note addressed to him from Chanyeol.

Baekhyun, if you’re reading this that means that I bit the dust. EIther that or you were snooping. If you were snooping shame on you. If not, I’m sorry. Baekhyun. When I met you I never knew what love was. All I knew was that I laid eyes on someone breathtaking. Literally, you bodychecked me. Everything you did was so honest. You never hid your emotions, never hesitated to voice your opinion and would put up the world’s fiercest fight for what you believe is right. Just because I’m gone doesn’t mean you have to be sad. Life moves on, with or without me. I don’t want you to forget me, I want you to remember the good times we had and draw happiness through those memories. Byun Baekhyun, always remember, you should smile. You look best when you’re happy. I will always love you.  
Baekhyun clutched the letter in his hand and smiled because Chanyeol was right about everything. “I love you too, Park Chanyeol.”

 

End~ 

~x~x~~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~  
A/N: Wow! After two months exactly, I finished this story. I had an amazing time writing it and I truly hope that anyone who reads this enjoys it. It feels good to finally click the mark this story complete box! If you see any typos, please point them out so I can fix them and please comment, subscribe and upvote!


	2. Before the Year's End

Synopsis  
Baekhyun’s life wasn’t ideal.  
Chanyeol’s used to be.  
Prequel to 3.6.5

Started: 21/08/2016  
Ended: 10/09/2016  
Word Count: 3 959

Baekhyun Interlude

Byun Baekhyun loved his mother than he loved anyone else in the whole world. She was the most caring person in the entire world, taking care of Baekbeom, their father- Byun Yoo Jin- and himself. The smaller lady was supportive and later on, Baekhyun found out she was also the glue that held their family together.   
One day, Baekhyun and Baekbeom were sitting on the couch in the small living room, watching a variety show on the decent-sized flat screen television. The two boy’s father had just gotten home and their mother was cooking dinner.   
Yoo Jin had called Baekhyun and Baekbeom into the kitchen and sat them down at the table.   
The brunet had noticed that both his mom and dad had been acting strange. They were always on edge and didn’t talk to each other much. It was unsettling but Baekhyun didn’t know what to do. He tried to ask Baekbeom about it, however the minute he brought it up, his older brother got defensive and soon after, stopped talking altogether.   
Yoo Jin called his wife and the two sat beside their children, side by side, not touching. Then, all at once, Baekhyun’s life came crashing down.   
“Your father and I are getting a divorce.”

The following week, Baekhyun’s mother left the house, taking all of her things with her.   
Baekhyun had no idea where the loving, affectionate, supportive mother he once had had gone, but soon he didn’t care. The small male’s father would leave to take care of paperwork and custody and other trivial things that came with a divorce. Even Baekbeom, who had been almost twenty at the time, went to court for the custody battle over Baekhyun, who had only been 14.   
Eventually, Baekhyun’s mother lost custody and stopped contacting the three males altogether. 

Baekhyun’s dad started drinking when he was around fifteen. He would come home late at night, hours after he was finished working, smelling of alcohol and sweat. It didn’t take a genius to guess what he’d been up to, however, Baekhyun never admitted aloud what he and his brother already knew.   
One night in particular was bad. Really bad. Yoo Jin had gotten home at around three in the morning, the smell of booze stuck to his very being. Baekhyun had been sleeping on the couch, waiting for his father to come home. He had heard the door open and sat up, pushing the blanket aside to help his father to bed.   
Except when his father saw him, he erupted.   
“What the fuck. Who do you think you are?”   
Baekhyun didn’t know what to do. He stood there in shock, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. The look in his father’s eyes was horrid. He was drunk and angry. The younger’s breathing became shallow. “What do you mean?” He finally managed to get the words out. It sounded chocked and afraid.   
“It’s all your damn fault. You and that brother of yours are to blame!” He took a step closer, his fists clenching hard; his knuckles were drained of colour.   
“What’s our fault?” Baekhyun demanded. “Please, dad! Answer me!”   
Yoo Jin scoffed. “What right do you have to call me father?” He walked up to his son until there were only a few inches away. The height difference was certainly noticeable. A near-fifty year old man and a fourteen year old teenager. It was intimidating to say the least. Baekhyun felt the cold sweat beginning to form on his forehead and his hands grew clammy.  
He’d never been afraid of his father before, however this man was certainly not his father. From his deep voice that slurred words to his disheveled appearance, no part of this man resembled the Byun Yoo Jin Baekhyun called ‘dad’.  
“Dad,” The brunet called out. “You’re scaring me.”   
Suddenly, there was a searing pain across Baekhyun’s cheek. With a surprised and pained gasp, the smaller brought a hand up to his cheek. “I told you not to call me father.”   
The next blow landed on the side of his head. Baekhyun brought up his hands and tried his best to block his face from his father’s fists. He felt tears well in his eyes, pain radiating through his head. His mouth tasted like metal; he could taste the blood pooling on his tongue. 

Baekhyun didn't sleep that night. Or the night after that. He also didn’t go to school for almost a week. His father had locked him in his room. The Byun household cannot gain a bad reputation, Yoo Jin had said.   
Bruises littered Baekhyun’s cheeks, his lip was split and his left eye was a purple-green colour.  
Whenever the brunet tried to sleep, he would wake up in cold sweat, images of his father’s drunken rage swirling through his head. 

Baekbeom came home one late afternoon and saw Baekhyun sleeping on the couch. As soon as the front door closed behind him, the sleeping male shot up. He was breathing fast, one hand placed over his chest.   
“You alright?” He asked.   
Baekhyun took a deep breath and nodded.   
“Go back to sleep, then.” His voice was monotone and he walked up the stairs and into his bedroom.   
Baekhyun did as he was told and tried his best to fall back asleep, despite the nightmares. 

That was the last time Baekhyun saw Baekbeom for a long time. 

Baekhyun stopped waiting for his dad to come home. It never ended well; he would get a hiding and miss a day or two of school. That was when the small male started to use makeup. He would do his best to cover up his bruises with foundation and concealer. It seemed to work; his friends at school didn't notice or if they did, they didn't comment on it. Cuts, however, were a different story. He couldn’t hide the cuts on the bridge of his nose or by the corner of his lips.

One day was worse than all the rest. His father came home early in the morning, around four or five. Baekhyun had been on his bed with the lights off. His eyes had adjusted to the darkness, so he started at the ceiling, unmoving.  
He heard the door open and close. He heard the sound of his father kicking off his shoes. He heard the footsteps coming up the stairs, approaching his room.  
Slowly, the bedroom door swung open. The creak from the hinges was loud in the otherwise silent house.   
Baekhyun closed his eyes and pretended to sleep, ignoring the way his heart began to race in fear.  
Yoo Jin walked over to his son’s bed, his footsteps heavy.   
“Get your ass up.”   
Baekhyun kept his eyes closed, not wanting to see what his father was doing.   
“I said, get up right now.” His voice was loud, practically a shout.   
Baekhyun’s father hit him hard, backhand to the side of his head. His ears rung for a minute and he shot up.  
That night, Baekhyun was sent to the hospital. He had a broken rib and three broken fingers.   
The doctors kept asking how he managed to hurt himself so badly. The teen simply stated he had fallen down the stairs because it was too dark to see. Apparently, the doctors believed him.

Two days later, Baekhyun was discharged. He was brought home by his father, who was oddly silent the whole way back home. Not that the brunet cared; if Yoo Jin ever spoke to him again, it would be too soon. 

On Baekhyun’s sixteenth birthday, he hadn’t returned home. Instead, he stayed over at his friend’s house. Zhang Yixing was a friendly person he’d met in grade nine science.   
The taller always sported a dazed look and his speech was heavily accented. Baekhyun found out he was Chinese about a month after they met. The brunet didn’t speak Chinese but his new friend had taught him a few words and sayings. Baekhyun was pretty sure that most of them were swear words but Yixing refused to tell him.   
Baekhyun slept on the floor and his older friend slept on the couch beside him. Yixing never asked about the shorter’s life at home, and for that, Baekhyun was thankful, however he was pretty sure that he knew or at least had an idea about what was going on.   
This night was a little different.   
“Hey, Baek,” Yixing called out quietly, just in case the said male was asleep. He got a groan in response. “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”   
“Shoot.”   
There was a pause, and then, “Why do you still live with your dad?” Yixing asked. “I know what he does to you.”   
Baekhyun froze. His heart clenched painfully at the thought that his best friend knew what he was going through. If Yixing knew, who else had been able to figure it out? Shaking himself, Baekhyun looked at his friend in the dark. “I don’t know what you mean.”   
“Yes, you do. I’ve seen the bruises. I see the way you flinch when he touches you. So,” Yixing turned and faced Baekhyun, trying to find his friend in the darkness. “Why do you stay?”  
“It’s none of your business.”  
“It will be when you’re sent to the hospital again.”   
Baekhyun shot up, the blanket pooling at his waist. “Shut the fuck up, Yixing.” His voice was colder than ice and even though he couldn’t see, Yixing knew that his friend was glaring at him.   
So, he did. He stopped talking and rolled over. A few minutes passed and Yixing looked at his friend one last time. Baekhyun looked like he was sleeping. “Goodnight, Baekhyun.”

Around a month later, Baekhyun discovered he enjoyed cutting. Control pain was enjoyable; it sent a rush over power and adrenaline through his veins like nothing else could. When the blade sliced his skin open, it was overwhelming and addictive.   
But it got rid of his nightmares. It made him feel human after his father’s almost daily beatings. It took away his father’s pain and replaced it with his own. It felt surreal. 

Two years later, in late November, Yoo Jin brought home a girl. She was a few years younger than his father, however they were total opposites. Where Yoo Jin was hostile and cold-hearted, the lady was nice and treated Baekhyun like a son. 

The first time Yoo Jin beat Baekhyun in front of his girlfriend, she had threatened to leave with the boy. She wanted to call children’s aid to get Baekhyun away. That’s when he hit her. Right in the face. She had ried out and fell to the floor.   
He didn’t look resentful, he didn’t even look sorry. Yoo Jin just stared at the two, huddled together, cowering in fear at the man above them.

Baekhyun liked the lady. Her name was Jin Hyun Mi. Hyun Mi was strong; spoke her mind and did what she thought was right.   
But sometimes, good people like her were walked over and cowards like his father reigned victorious.

Chanyeol Interlude

June 31st, 1:30am  
“Let’s go! I don’t want to be late!” Park Yoora, Chanyeol’s older sister beckoned. They were heading to the airport to catch their plane to Jeju Island. Chanyeol didn’t know why they had to get up at the buttcrack of dawn to be at the airport at freaking three in the morning, but his excitement was more prominent than his drowsiness.   
With a smile plastered on his face, Chanyeol threw his suitcase in the backseat and hopped in. 

June 2nd  
Chanyeol smiled and hooked an arm around Jongdae’s waist. He and his best friend were walking home from school together. Since they were neighbours, their houses across the street from each other, Jongdae and Chanyeol had been friends since they were young. Well, Jongdae didn’t like Chanyeol at the beginning; he didn’t like the way the taller would follow him around, asking to play with him and his friends constantly. But eventually, the kid grew on him.   
And now, they were together. Most people thought it was weird- Chanyeol, the tall, lanky basketball jock and Jongdae, the small, quiet singer paired together never really crossed anyone’s mind.   
Regardless, the two worked out really well.   
Jongdae had came out to his parents in the ninth grade. He had known he was gay since the eighth grade when he never engaged in conversation about crushed, seeing as he never had one, or girl’s since he never paid attention to them in that way.   
The singer remembered the day he came out clearly. He and Chanyeol were sitting on Jongdae’s bed, playing on the Playstation two that was perched on the desk in front of them. He had wanted to tell his younger friend for a long time but he found that every time he had a chance, he gave up and changed the subject.  
But that day was different. Jongdae decided that he tell Chanyeol about his sexuality.  
Chanyeol had thrown his game controller on the bed after losing a match and was grumbling as per usual. Jongdae cleared his throat and the taller looked down at him questioningly. “Can I talk to you Yeol?” He had asked.   
Chanyeol smiled. “Of course. You can tell me anything!” The smile had been so pretty and genuine and sincere, taking away all the nerves and anxiety Jongdae had felt.   
“I… I’m gay.”   
Jongdae looked at Chanyeol’s face for a moment, studying it for any sign of disgust or horror. To his relief - and surprise- the younger just smiled harder. “Okay.Cool!”  
Jongdae had stared incredulously at his friend. “No, Yeol. I’m being serious.” He was beyond confused.   
“I know. It’s alright, it doesn’t change anything.”  
Jongdae was so thankful. He felt safe and free to be himself around Chanyeol. That was really all he needed; one person to trust him, to care for him and to support him, no matter who he was.  
And Chanyeol was that person.  
Jongade vowed to be that person for Chanyeol too, from that day forward. 

Chanyeol had came out almost six months later, although much more nonchalant and less shy.   
He still hadn’t told his parents or his sister, however. Chanyeol didn’t know if they would be supportive; they never spoke about sexuality, never asked if he had a crush or if he had any girlfriends. In a way, it was okay- it saved him from the awkwardness most people his age had to endure- however, it made him uncertain about himself at times. Did they care? What would they think about it?  
A few days prior, Chanyeol had told Jongdae about his thoughts, why he hadn’t come out to his parents after dating him for almost five months. As always, his boyfriend came up with a plan. They would tell Chanyeol’s parents together.  
So, that’s was where they were headed. Chanyeol was nervous, of course, but Jongdae being beside it bearable. 

June 31st, 2:30am  
“Mom, can you turn the radio up, I can’t hear it.” Chanyeol asked from the backseat.   
The woman smiled to him in the rearview mirror. “Sure, honey.” She twisted the dial and the volume went up a little.  
Chanyeol thanked her and leaned his head against the window. Yoora had already fallen asleep and his dad was on his phone in the passenger seat.   
It was two thirty and the youngest was tired. He tried to get himself comfortable so he could sleep, given the cramped space.  
Chanyeol closed his eyes and let sleep take him. 

June 2nd  
“Hi, Jongdae.” Chanyeol’s mother greeted when she saw the two boys entre the house.   
Jongdae smiled. “Hello Mrs. Park.”   
Chanyeol scoffed in mock-annoyance. “I’m here too, mom.” He tried to hide his smile, but within seconds his signature grin was back on his face.   
The older woman smiled. “Oh, hush Yeollie.” She laughed. “I see you every day.”  
“You see Jongdae almost every day too!” Chanyeol shot back.   
Chanyeol’s mom ignored him, instead she focused on Jongdae. “Are you staying for dinner?”   
“If it’s alright.” The shorter said.  
“Of course I don’t mind.” 

“When do you want to tell her?” Jongdae asked. The two had decided to hang in Chanyeol’s room until it was time for dinner. They were situated on the small bed. Chanyeol was thinking too much, Jongdae could tell. He was biting his lower lip and his eye was twitching, but not in the same way it did when he smiled.   
Chanyeol shrugged. “I was thinking at dinner. That way mom, dad and Yoora would all be together and I wouldn’t have to tell them all one by one.”   
Jongdae nodded. He really did feel bad for his boyfriend. He never had this problem when he came out; his parents were supporters of equal rights and the LGBTQ community. It wasn’t to hard to tell them about his sexuality. Chanyeol’s parents on the other hand were tight lipped whenever sexual orientation was brought into conversation.   
The shorter put a comforting hand on the younger’s back. “You’ll be fine.”   
Chanyeol sighed. “I know.” He turned his body and curled into himself, letting Jongdae hold him. “Thank you.” 

June 31st, 3:15 am  
“Are you kidding me?” Chanyeol’s dad rumbled from the front seat. The younger had woken up only a few minutes prior when he heard his father curse. “We’re going to be late!”   
Chanyeol heard his mom saying something, although her voice was too low to be heard from the backseat.   
“I’m not going to calm down! How do we just run out of gas?”   
That’s when Chanyeol noticed they weren’t moving. They were stuck in the middle of the road, not even on the shoulder. It was still dark outside and there were no other cars around to help. Chanyeol’s mom said something again, louder this time. “Let’s go outside and see if we can fix it ourselves.”   
“What does that even mean? We are out of gas! We can’t fix this unless one of us walks six kilometres down the road to the nearest gas station!”   
Beside him, Yoora shifted in her seat. Her eyes fluttered open and she glanced at Chanyeol. “What’s going on?” She asked.   
The younger smiled. “It’s nothing. We’re just out of gas.”   
His sister made a small noise in the back of her throat. Chanyeol knew what it meant; she was annoyed but didn’t want to show it. The taller smiled wider and poked his sister’s side. Yoora flinched and swatted his hand away.   
The commotion alerted their parents to their presence and they settled down.   
“Guys, it seems like we’ll be stuck here for a while.” Their mother said, turning around to look at her kids.   
Chanyeol nodded and Yoora groaned.  
“Look at the bright side,” Chanyeol sing-songed. “You get to spend more time with me.” He waggled his eyebrows. His father chuckled lightly from the front seat.   
Yoora shrieked when Chanyeol leaned in closer, ready to tickle his sister. “Mother! Get your son off of m-”  
There was a flash of bright light, along with the blaring of a car horn and a loud crash. Chanyeol was thrown around violently, hitting his head against the window. Pain exploded in his head and a crack sounded from his arm when he landed on it. The last thing he heard before he passed out was the sound of his sister’s agonised cried and the radio playing at full blast.

June 2nd  
“Is something wrong, Chanyeol? You’ve barely touched your plate?”   
Chanyeol shook his head, a little too quickly to be convincing. His mother raised an eyebrow quizzically, concern evident in her face. “Chanyeol,” She scolded. “I know when something is wrong with my own son.”   
The said male gulped and looked to Jongdae, who was seated beside him. The older placed a reassuring hand on his thigh and gave a slight nod.   
“I… I’m…” Chanyeol struggled to find the words. They seemed to be on the tip of his tongue but didn’t want to come out. Get it? Come out. Haha. “I’m gay.”  
Chanyeol’s mother stared at him for a minute, although to him it felt more like hours. Then, she made an ‘o’ shape with her mouth. His father was just staring and Yoora had paled. Immediately, Chanyeol felt the need to explain himself. He opened his mouth, not really knowing what he was going to say when suddenly, he heard his sister chuckle.   
He turned to the older, a confused, slightly horrified expression on his face. “Thank God!” She all but yelled.   
Chanyeol looked at his sister. “What the fu-”  
“We thought you were on drugs!” His dad said.  
“This is such a relief!”  
Chanyeol could feel his eyes tearing up. Jongdae was at his side, rubbing his back, saying how he was so proud of him for being brave, coming out. He was proud of himself too, but mostly, Chanyeol was relieved to be accepted.

June 28  
Being openly gay at school was certainly not the best experience. More than once, Chanyeol had been subjected to homophobic slurs and what not. It was like the minute the other boys found out he was gay, they all assumed he would jump their bones.   
Most students would avoid showering with him after P.E and would avoid changing while he was around. Not that Chanyeol cared. More privacy for him. 

July 5  
Pain.   
Chanyeol opened his eyes, blinking against the bright light.  
Ow.  
There was a dull throbbing in his head, accented by sharp, stinging pain and a loud beep.  
Pain.  
His tried to lift his arm only to find he couldn’t. Chanyeol glanced down, horrified of what he’d see. His arm was in a cast, from his wrist all the way up to his elbow. There wasn’t much skin visible, but what he could see were purpling bruises along his limbs, along with cuts and scrapes.  
Chanyeol looked towards his leg, which wasn’t in a cast but felt as though it was on fire. There was a fairly large bandage wrapped his shin.   
Bile rose in his throat. He couldn’t remember a single thing. He was talking to Yoora and then… nothing. Chanyeol. Regardless of the fact that he couldn’t remember much, the tall male had a strong feeling something was wrong. 

He didn’t want to be right.

“I’m sorry for your loss.”

Three Years Later  
“Chanyeol I can’t deal with this anymore!” Jongdae cried. “I love you but I can’t be with someone who can’t function!”  
Chanyeol looked at the shorter male with tears in his eyes. He wanted to reach out and hug his boyfriend but he knew the action would be unwelcome. “Please. Jongdae, please. I love you.” He muttered quietly, his voice cracking.  
Jongdae sighed. “I know you do. And I love you too, I really do,” He paused, looking into Chanyeol’s eyes. “But I can’t deal with this anymore. They died years ago. You need to let go.”   
“But I can’t! Jongdae I can’t!” Chanyeol cried out, the tears in his eyes spilling over his cheeks, leaving tracks in their wake.   
“You can’t be sad forever. You’re just dragging everyone else around you down. What happened to Happy Virus?”  
Chanyeol shook his head. “He doesn’t exist anymore. He died when my family did.”  
The shorter frowned. “Then we’re done.”   
With that, Jongdae left their shared dorm room,slamming the door behind him. Chanyeol broke down, his knees buckling and his sobs echoing loudly in the small, empty room.   
Chanyeol knew he had to move on. He just couldn’t bring himself to do it.


End file.
